People think you have an easy life as a playboy of the western world, but they are so wrong. Since you started, the western world has changed beyond recognition.
To begin with, there's been systematic deregulation. Now anyone who wants to set himself up as a West of Ireland playboy can start on the tour, going from disco to disco, using, abusing, then casting aside.
To stay ahead of the game, you must invest heavily in new equipment. True, you have a large Ford Granada with an eight-track tape system and its own curtains but, for a touch of class, you need the car fridge.
It is less than a foot tall, plugs into the cigarette lighter on the dashboard, and holds six cans or small bottles of Harp or Babycham. Car fridge $75 (€84.67) is available at www.thinkgeek.com.
Got a gizmo? Contact smaccarthaigh@irish-times.ie