With the Budget on the way next week it seems a good time to poke a little gentle fun at the accountants who manage our tax affairs:

What is an accountant? Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

What's the definition of a good tax accountant? Someone who has a loophole named after him.

An accountant who is finding it hard to get a good night's sleep goes to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just cannot get to sleep at night."

"Have you tried counting sheep?" the doctor asks. "That's my problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it."

How do you drive an accountant completely insane? Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and fold up a road map the wrong way.