Ground Floor Sheila O'Flanagan: I'm always a bit confused as to what exactly constitutes a reality TV show.
Is it something like the mind-numbingly awful Big Brother (an extended audition for people who want to make a career out of being famous); the equally awful but slightly more engaging Pop Idol (another extended audition but this time for people who sing in front of their mirror holding a hairbrush at night); or the ultimately watchable but totally vacuous I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here (a new audition for people whose careers have slipped below the radar).
Maybe we define reality TV as the fly-on-the-wall type programmes like Wife Swap or Boss Swap. I want to watch Boss Swap but haven't managed to be in on the right night for it yet. Of course the world's best reality TV programme is the award winning The Office, which is actually fiction. This must tell us something about TV programming but I'm not sure exactly what!
Anyway the reason that the reality shows are so popular with the networks is that they and the phone companies make lots and lots of money every time anyone votes to oust someone from the house or the set or the jungle. It's such a simple way of voting that I can't help thinking it might work well at shareholders' meetings in the future.
In fact maybe the entire proceedings could be televised in yet another reality series - 'I'm a Board Member, Get Me Out of Here'. The cameras could follow the management around for the months leading up to the meeting and each person could make a pitch to be kept on.
If you want the board to get an increase in their emoluments simply text Yes to a certain number. If you want to oust the managing director simply text his name to the same number. Easy! The technology is there to do it and it'd be much simpler than worrying about all those proxy cards and getting to meetings in Dublin when you're living in Kerry.
It might be yet another programme to add to the armoury of the newly merged Carlton and Granada companies which have finally come together under the ITV banner. If you remember, both companies were having a bad time last year with falling viewing figures and - even worse - falling advertising revenue.
The net result was that the shareholders (this time the institutional rather than private) who held Carlton shares made a decision to vote to remove Michael Green from the equation.
Unlike the chirpy Mike Reid who kept the ubiquitous stiff upper lip when he was ejected from the jungle this week, Michael Green wasn't going to leave Carlton (in which he'd bought an initial stake back in 1987 and which he regarded as his company) quietly, and the whole affair caused quite a stir in the City. But there's no going back once the votes have been cast and so Charles Allen, the head of Granada, is now the head of the new, improved ITV company.
Initial response from the analysts was positive and the shares gained in the first few hours of trading, valuing the company at £6 billion. Charles Allen - knowing how to work the crowd - said that it was "thrilling".
However not everyone is hopeful regarding Charles's future and there is a feeling that Fidelity, the fund management group that voted to get rid of Michael Green, still wants to eject Mr Allen.
However there are certain issues that, in the short term, favour him. The BBC debacle of the Hutton enquiry means that media-watchers are expecting its programming to be more public-broadcasting oriented and less commercial in the near future, which is a bonus to ITV. Departed director-general, Greg Dyke - who had won audiences share - is spitting fire. The corporation is in a state of disarray.
Meanwhile ITV itself still hasn't managed to appoint a chairman. Michael Green had been lined up for the job prior to his departure and investors will want to have someone in place before they vote to get rid of anyone else. Which means that the top spot is being looked at very keenly indeed.
Apparently there's now a short list of five candidates. Leading the pack is Lord MacLaurin, the current chairman of Vodafone. Another Vodafone luminary, the ex-chief executive Sir Christopher Gent (himself no mean slouch in the inflated pay packet department) is also on the list.
To add a little spice to proceedings, there are those suggesting that an out-of-work Greg Dyke might throw his hat into the ring. Nice though the idea is, the shareholders won't want a chairman who has become a mortal enemy of the government.
But Charles Allen is milking the publicity right now. He's called for the BBC to be brought under the same regulatory authority as ITV and BSkyB saying that ITV is never asked to be "judge and jury" because the decisions that are made are subject to external regulation. Not that I want to be elitist about it but have you ever watched the ITV news? The only decisions that they make there is how sugary they can make even the worst story sound.
Anyway, the ability of Allen to hold onto his post will depend both on the newly appointed chairman and the market share that ITV can carve out for itself. Some forecasters have issued warnings that it will be impossible for the company to maintain its current percentage of advertising revenue on the basis that by 2010, almost everyone will be accessing a plethora of digital channels. The conclusion is that ITV itself must develop a digital strategy.
Which more or less leads us back to where it all went wrong for Michael Green in the first place, since he bore the brunt of the disaster that was ITV Digital.
It's more exciting than the celebrity jungle. Though I wonder how they'd fare in a bushtucker trial.
