How do you safeguard your rights against unco-operative or aggressive employees or managers? Should you focus on the perpetrator or the victim of ill-discipline? And how should the expression of emotion be managed in your workplace? According to Dr Tony Humphreys, clinical psychologist and author of A Different Kind of Discipline, violated rights in the workplace which are not addressed will eat into staff morale and damage the organisation.
Moreover, if people's feelings are not listened to or responded to, productivity will suffer and you are "more likely to get sabotage in the workplace".
All employees should be confident that their physical, sexual, emotional, intellectual, social and creative rights are protected. But there are often violations of these workplace rights.
"The most accurate barometer of any human person is their feelings. But in many workplaces your feelings are dismissed or they are suppressed, repressed, diluted or projected," Dr Humphreys says.
"If a worker comes to a manager and says `I'm concerned about something' and his feelings are dismissed, that is a violation of the worker's emotional rights.
"Or if there's a reaction of suppression: `Now you shouldn't be feeling like that' or `Don't be getting upset' or `Don't be getting angry' - that again is a violation," he says.
But surely the last thing a manager with a deadline needs is somebody presenting an emotional problem? "Right, so what you have now is a competition of feelings. There's a conflict between the two sets of feelings. If the manager is wise, he will communicate that feeling to the worker and say: `Listen, I would like to hear what you need to say right now, but I'm under pressure myself. Can we arrange to have a meeting?'," Dr Humphreys explains.
He says the employee goes away "feeling respected and heard and won't go away with revengeful feelings." The other unhealthy response is to neutralise other people's feelings. A worker might say to a colleague: "Listen, I was really upset the way the manager talked to me there. He really humiliated me in front of other people." If the fellow worker says "Ah, you'll feel better about it tomorrow", that "neutralises my feelings, shows no respect for my feelings", says Dr Humphreys. The healthiest response is to listen.
"Listening is the most important action of all and says `I understand what you feel. It's important to respect those feelings and I'm glad you're talking them out'," says Dr Humphreys. If a person's feelings are rejected or dismissed, he won't feel happy in that workplace. He will feel resentful, self-esteem will be low and if it is generalised there will be low staff morale and productivity will inevitably suffer, says Dr Humphreys.
Correction of discipline problems should focus on the victim, not on the perpetrator, he says. For example, if a worker bullies a manager or supervisor - which is not unusual - the supervisor's rights are violated. The work organisation should have structures which the supervisor can use to restore his violated rights.
There should be a hierarchy of responses. The supervisor might have a right as part of a workplace discipline system to say "I'm not accepting that behaviour and I would like an apology now please".
If the apology is not forthcoming, he could say: "That behaviour is not acceptable and I'm suspending you right now until this issue is resolved." "Now he does that, not to punish the worker but to restore his violated rights. And the organisation should back him up in that," says Dr Humphreys.
The manager should support the supervisor but also address why the worker is being aggressive and, if applicable, why the supervisor is being passive. "Discipline is separate from resolving the reasons for the discipline problems. Discipline is the safeguarding of a right that has been violated.
"And that has to happen first before you go to the second stage which I call beyond discipline: `Why is this leader being passive? And why is this worker being aggressive'?"
The ideal, if you have very strong self-esteem, is that "you won't actually take abuse from anybody. But there are not too many people out there like that," he says.
A one-day seminar with Dr Tony Humphreys based on his book A Different Kind of Discipline takes place this Sunday, November 8th, at the Red Cow Moran's Hotel, Naas Road, Dublin 22. Tickets £39. For further information, telephone 01 281 8432 or, from Northern Ireland, 0800 973203.
