A father said he will have “some peace for the kids for Christmas” after getting a protection order against their mother.
The man told the emergency domestic violence court at Dolphin House, Dublin, he and his ex-partner have been separated for a number of years but continue to share their home.
She is on drugs and drink most days and “turns very angry”, he said. He called gardaí in recent days after she was verbally abusive to him when he was giving their children money for Christmas. He pays the mortgage, she “pays nothing” and he was concerned she had put a vehicle into the name of their teenage son and is driving it with no tax or insurance.
Their daughter has had counselling due to her mother’s drink and drug issues, he added.
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As he left court, the man said: “Finally I’ll have some peace for the kids for Christmas.”
Several ex-parte (one side only represented) applications before Judge Gerard Furlong on Friday were by parents seeking protection from their adult sons.
One woman said she was “extremely frightened” of her son, aged in his 20s, who subjects herself and her adult daughter with special needs to violence, psychological abuse and intimidation. He had threatened her with knives, forcing her to lock herself into her bedroom for her own protection, and uses her bank card without her permission, she said.
She is often too scared to leave the house because of his “significant mood swings”. He has broken windows, damaged pipes and electrical items, cut wires and frequently carries weapons, she said. “I feel trapped and unsafe.”
Her son has a mental health diagnosis and expresses paranoid beliefs, she said. He threatens to kill himself if she does not comply with his “impossible demands” and gardaí were called several times. She is recovering from a serious illness and needs protection for herself and her daughter, she said.
The judge, granting an interim barring order, said he was “absolutely certain” it was necessary.
Another woman said her son, now in his 20s, began dealing weed from their home when he was aged 17 and appeared to have moved on to other drugs, perhaps heroin.
She had seen bags of drugs in a shed at the house and reported it to gardaí, she said. “He’s well known to them, believe me.”
She and two other adult children, and a baby, live in the house and her son has threatened to burn it down and goes around kicking doors. “I can’t deal with it.”
In another application, a woman who said she was “terrified” of her ex-partner got a protection order. “I’m just afraid, I don’t know what’s next, he is so unpredictable,” she said.
They separated about eight years ago but he recently came to her home, banging on the door and she and their teenage children were “terrified he would get in and stab us”.
While on drugs and drinking, he tried to stab his mother and brother in their home, she said. He had gone to their child’s school drunk, seeking to collect him before school was over.
This was her third application for protection, the woman said. Gardaí had sought to arrest her ex but she believed they had been unable to locate him.
In another case, a man said he asked his wife for a divorce last month and believed she has since then been in contact with Women’s Aid and is “building a case” against him based on “false allegations”. He believed she recently got a protection order against him but it had not yet been served.
His wife is “unpredictable”, has mental health issues, suffered a breakdown in recent months and made threats to take her own life, he said. The judge said he would grant a protection order and hoped mediation might resolve some of the issues.
