They tried to make AIBHE MALONEgo to rehab and she said "yeah, all right then"

TRACK OF THE WEEK

Do it Like a Dudeby Jessie J. We're a little bit jelly of Jessie J (below). Not only did she write Party in the USA for Miley Cyrus, she's also got great hair and she's younger than us (only by a year, though). Not content with all that, she's only gone and released a pop belter for her debut single. Do it Like a Dudeborrows Ciara's gangster swag, and couples it with Rihanna's ear for a hook. It's very good indeed.

Poor Demi Lovato. We look away for one minute and she’s been shipped off to rehab for “stress-related issues”. The breaking point came while on tour with the Jonas Brothers, when the 18-year-old allegedly got in a scuffle with a backing dancer. Being dumped and then having to go on tour and promote a film starring your dumper would send any girl into emotional turmoil – especially if the cad in question was a JoBro. Get better soon, Demi.

The ongoing “feud” between Cheryl Cole and Nadine Coyle is something we’d rather not dwell on, but it does look like Nadine’s single is doing less well than we’d all hoped. As in, sold-150-copies-on-the-first-day less well. Nad’s not worried, though. “To be honest, I’m happier doing what I’m doing now, no matter what the sales are like. I’d rather be singing in pubs for 50 quid a night and be happy than doing something that I wasn’t really interested in or passionate about,” she says. Right. We’ll leave it at that.

When Rihanna missed Katy Perry’s wedding due to “work commitments” (lamest excuse ever) we were worried it might be the end of our second- favourite showbiz friendship (FYI, our fave is Beyoncé/Gaga). Being the good Christian she is, though, Katy (right, with Ri-Ri) is ready to forgive. Chatting to MTV, Perry assured that all was cool, explaining “I bent her over and smacked her on the ass . . . and then I forgave her and then I said, ‘I love you, bitch!’” That’s one way to settle an argument.