Latest CD releases reviewed
DAMIEN RICE & LISA HANNIGAN
Unplayed Piano DRM
*
A painfully earnest ode to Burmese dissident Aung San Suu Kyi, who is spending her 60th birthday under house arrest. Good cause, boring song. Hey, let's put the cross-legged brigade under house arrest, and if they come within 50 yards of Whelan's . . .
THOMAS FALKE
High Again (High on Emotion)Manifesto
*
Looks like Chris de Burgh still has a few fans; Falke likes him so much he's sampled his cheesy 1980s tune for this even cheesier dance anthem. Luckily, the vocals have been so munchkinised, it sounds more like Tinky Winky than Chrissy Wissy.
PORN TRAUMA
Sunrise www.porntrauma.com
**
Porn Trauma - is that what happens when your copy of Debbie Does Dallas gets chewed up by the video player? Unlike your average porno vid, however, this tune takes far too long to get to the action. Cut that intro by 30 seconds, dudes.
DO ME BAD THINGS
Move in Stereo (Liv Ullman on Drums) Must Destroy
***
They're Croydon's answer to Scissor Sisters, but can they cut it in the world of mainstream pop? Like a camp Frank Zappa fronting Earth, Wind and Fire, this is strangely strange but oddly catchy. Never knew the Norwegian actress could play drums.
THE BRAKES
All Night Disco Party Rough Trade
****
The Brakes are off tonight, that's for sure. This is a sort of super party band comprising Tom and Alex from Electric Soft Parade, Eamon from British Sea Power and Marc from The Tenderfoot. Think Life During Wartime after the curfew has been lifted. Party on!
MARIAH CAREY
We Belong Together Island Def Jam
**
Mad Mariah is back on the mic, and no one can do that going-up-and-down-and-up-again vocal cadence better than she can. Here's a slow song of longing and unrequited lust that makes J-Lo sound like the cleaning woman.
TUPAC
Ghetto Gospel Interscope
*
Rest in peace? Since his death all those yonks ago, Tupac has never been busier, as every syllable he ever uttered is reconstituted into a rap song. Here, he's surgically attached to an Elton John sample - horrific.
