From an on-air vasectomy to parachute jumps, romantic gestures for St Valentine's Day are putting serious pressure on the more traditional gifts of flowers and chocolate
Love is . . . paying through the nose for a St Valentine's Day gift. At least, that's what an increasing number of couples think. Although chocolates and flowers are still the big sellers at this time of the year, more extravagant gestures continue to challenge the romantic notion that you can't buy love.
One couple has spent €9,000 on some deeply significant gifts for each other this year. They are getting married in the summer and want to look their best, so they felt a little cosmetic surgery was just the thing.
He has booked his valentine in for a €5,000 bust-enhancement operation. She is paying €4,000 for him to have liposculpture, an operation that should banish the love handles around his tummy. And they say romance is dead.
They will have the operations on Monday, at the Advanced Cosmetic Institute in Dublin, which according to its owner, Halina Ashdown-Sheils, enhanced 73 per cent more lips, legs, faces and bottoms last month than it did in January last year.
Also having surgery is Roque Segadevieito (31), the producer of an alternative radio show on XFM, a London station. This morning he was due to have a vasectomy, live on air, at a Marie Stopes clinic. The father of two said he believed the 10-minute operation was the perfect gift for St Valentine's Day.
"Some women get flowers, but my wife is getting my vasectomy. She's got to be one of the luckiest women in London. It's the most romantic thing I've ever done for her," he says.
More traditionally, there has been the usual rush on lingerie stores this Valentine's season, but it is the tiny diamond-encrusted scrap of material on sale in Brown Thomas in Dublin that is attracting the big spenders - and the plain curious.
The people at Gossard say that at least one Irishwoman will today become the proud owner of the €200,000 G-string, which is decorated with 40 diamonds set in 18-carat white gold. Although only one Irishman has splurged on the real thing so far, the cheaper versions of the sparkly knickers cost just €27 - and were, according to one retail source this week, "walking out of the shop".
Whether as over- or underwear, diamonds are still a girl's best friend. Neville McDowell of Weir & Sons jewellers on Grafton Street says business is so good that he wishes it were February 14th every day.
He has sold a couple of heart-shaped diamond pendants for €3,000 each this week - and one lucky woman will have a very happy St Valentine's Day when her fiancé presents her with a €7,000 yellow-gold engagement ring topped with a cluster of heart-shaped diamonds.
"But the student who came in to buy a pair of €80 earrings for his girlfriend after saving up for months was just as satisfying a sale," says McDowell.
Jewellers are privy to lots of romantic secrets at this time of year. For Paul Sheeran, one of the most memorable was from a man who came into his store, off Grafton Street in Dublin, to buy a diamond ring. A few weeks earlier the sale had fallen through on the dream house he and his girlfriend were planning to buy.
What the girlfriend didn't know was that the estate agent subsequently rang the man to say the house had become available again. He bought the house without telling his girlfriend, drove her there and asked her to marry him by the light of hundreds of tiny candles.
Others have even loftier ways to pop the question on St Valentine's Day.
Kieran O'Connor of Aviation Services in Leixlip, Co Kildare, has plenty of stories about men - it's always men, he says - who pay hundreds of euro to have a Valentine's greeting or marriage proposal trailed on a banner behind an aircraft on February 14th.
"I think they are all nuts," says O'Connor, who was married at 23, separated at 27 and has been "faithful to myself ever since". When people phone him to request a marriage proposal on a banner, he tries his hardest to dissuade them.
"I say: Would you not reconsider, because it will save you a lot of money and a lot of hardship over the years?" he laughs.
If they are not put off by O'Connor's less than romantic banter, they might be by the cost of a message in the sky - it's about €500 a go. But those who pay up are convinced the gesture is worth it. One man arranged to meet his girlfriend on Dún Laoghaire pier, in Co Dublin, as O'Connor flew by trailing a banner festooned with the proposal. She said yes.
"Other people just want Happy Valentine's Day on the banner," says O'Connor. "The whole thing is very peculiar."
Fergus McDonnell of the Irish Parachute Club, which is based at Clonbullogue airfield in Co Offaly, knows that when it comes to St Valentine's Day, love is reaching new heights.
"Over the past few years there has been an increase in the number of people giving each other parachute jumps," he says. "Tandem parachute jumps are especially popular as a sign of love."
Caroline Maher (22), a travel agent from Co Tipperary, says a jump is the perfect gift for her adventurous, spontaneous boyfriend of two months. "It is something we have both always talked about doing, so I thought it would be a nice way to celebrate our first Valentine's Day as a couple," she says, adding that the €320 price tag was worth every cent.
But if, like Jennifer Lopez sings, your love don't cost a thing, it might be worth persuading the object of your affections to visit the love stone in Moone, Co Kildare, a romantic gesture that won't cost the earth.
Moone High Cross Inn is home to the 17th-century marriage rock, which emanates "a beautiful love energy", according to John Joseph Clynch, its appropriately named owner. Couples regularly travel to take their places on the specially designed seats on either side of the circular stone.
According to tradition, they are supposed to put their hands through the hole at its centre, cementing their love for ever. Cringe factor: high. Value of everlasting love: priceless.