An alternative look at today's news
Whats hot
Pressure cookersSteadily gaining in popularity in recent times as we realised our mothers were on to something, but now that Heston's using them, get in the queue. Plus, they're don't make those scary noises any more
R-E-S-P-E-C-T:Aretha Franklin, 69, is set to marry her "long-term friend" William Wilkerson, also 69. "LOL I'm not pregnant," said the diva. No one would blame you for trying, though, Aretha
'Down the Rabbit Hole'You'll gobble up Juan Pablo Villalobos's new novella in one sitting. Seventy pages of almost perfect prose
TattoosLana Del Rey's Born to Die video makes them look like the new black – just remember, tattoos are for life, not just for Saturday night . . .
Zooey DeschanelIf you haven't caught New Girl, E4's new Friday-night sitcom, fear not – watch it back on 4OD and prepare to fall in love
' The Killing' boxed setOkay, we're way behind the curve on this one but could there be any better way to get through the January evenings? Addictive
WHAT’S NOT
No refund sales policiesWe'd be happy with a credit note, but being told to find another garment, at the same value, at the same time, isn't on
Diet king Pierre DukanSuggesting French school children should be given extra marks if they stay slim? Deplorable
Spring/summer stockIf we wanted to think about bikinis, we wouldn't be in the midst of polishing off this Christmas pudding, thanks
New Year's resolutionsYou need a new year in order to reinvent yourself? Pish-posh, that's what Mondays are for
Bad wait staffIf you think I'm hanging around while you roll your eyes at me, you're sorely mistaken – now's the time to vote with your feet
Going through the binsDid you throw out that voucher with the wrapping paper?
