COMEDY:The Edinburgh Fringe Festival is 'a magnificent waste of time', where anyone can put on a show - and the toughest month of a comic's life. Comedian Maeve Higgins asks herself about the agony and the ecstasy, writes Jeannie O'Brien
THE EDINBURGH FRINGE FESTIVAL is the biggest arts festival in the world. Every day for the month of August, there are 1,800 shows on. Every day. All life is there - The Fringe covers theatre, comedy and music as well as all sorts of weirdo one-off events. The cool thing is that you don't have to be invited - any lunatic can do a show. Every room above a pub, every street corner, every shoebox counts as a venue. If you want to blow your mind, or have it blown for you, the Edinburgh Fringe festival is the place to go, whether you're a performer or not. I'm a comedian and this will be my third Fringe. I will now interview myself about it.
Hi Maeve. You look very pretty today. How are preparations for the Fringe festival going?
Oh, thank you, I'm wearing a lot of make-up. As for the preparations, I'm not sure. The months leading up to the Fringe are either hugely enjoyable or full of anxiety. They are enjoyable for people who have confidence in their ability and terrifying for people who harbour a constant fear of being found out as the talentless phony that they are. Most comedians I know fit into the second category.
When I'm under pressure to come up with new funnies, I get very easily distracted. I am not alone in this - Josie Long calls it "showcrastination", where the slightest thing can provide a welcome path away from the work at hand. My latest project is taking photos of my cat, Michael. I'm convinced he is expressionless. To test this, I've been telling him shocking facts, then photographing him immediately. Even after hearing that forced rhubarb grows so fast it can be heard squeaking, he has remained totally blank. This is all very interesting to me, but not helpful for my show.
I see. Tell me about your past experiences at the Fringe, please.
Oh. In 2006 I did a show with my sister Lilly. We made cakes and gave them to the crowd, lots of people came and I couldn't understand why comedians had told me it was going to be the toughest month of our lives. Last year I breezed back but chose an unsuitable venue and didn't make cakes. Fewer people came and I began to understand what the old guys meant. Both years I loved being there.
What is so good about it? Isn't it scary doing a show every day for a month and competing for an audience and still managing to look hot and everything?
Oh, you flatter me! I'm sure I don't look hot every day, just most days. Okay, I'll explain what being a performer at the festival means to a me. I tried to convey the scale of it to my brother. His name is Oliver and he is a geologist. I sometimes call him Geoliver, because I am a word nerd, or "werd". I asked him what his geological equivalent to the Edinburgh festival would be. It involves him being on a holiday in volcanic Sicily with Charles Lyell, the Victorian geologist and author of the multi-volume Principles of Geology - an attempt to explain the former changes of the Earth's surface by reference to causes now in operation. Each day the happy pair would natter away about stratigraphy and glaciers and things and throughout the trip there would be an earthquake, several massive lava fountains and a giant tidal wave. Nobody would be hurt, just fascinated and possibly over-stimulated. Above all, they would be inspired to keep geologising. I couldn't agree more.
Now Maeve, is performing there very different to performing here?
Yes, it sure is. For one thing, nobody knows or cares who I am at the Fringe, and that is good. Not that I'm famous here; I checked that through the medium of an informal "historical republicans" survey. I discovered that more people know Charles Stewart Parnell was an obstructionist than know that I'm a comedian, but my face is easier to recognise than that of Padraig Pearse's younger brother Willie.
Mmmm. What were your highlights of past festivals?
Last year, Kristen Schall's show made me incredibly happy and confusingly jealous. She's hilarious and very sure of what she wants to do on stage. In 2006 I saw Josie Long's show and loved it. She won a prize for that show and I was delighted. It was so good, totally free from cynicism and trickery and properly funny too. Daniel Kitson always does brilliant stand-up and Jason Byrne's shows are the best for pure laughter. It's worth taking chances on people you have never heard of as these can sometimes be beautiful surprises. Of course, there were also plentiful hours of excruciating crappiness from various performers that I have tried to forget.
What about reviews; do you read them and cry?
Suffice to say the whole business is grubby, and comedians are as much to blame as reviewers because we use their quotes and star ratings on our posters to try and flog tickets. Yuk!
What is a normal day at the Fringe for a performer?
This year I'm doing at least two shows a day; my stand-up show and a children's show with David O'Doherty. I'll also be doing short spots of unpredictable quality at a late show or two in between going to see shows I either want to or have promised to see, followed by frantically trying to catch up with the comedians I like and avoiding the ones I don't.
Should people go and see the Edinburgh Fringe for themselves?
Of course! It's one of the greatest spectacles of our time! Watching people trying and failing, or trying and succeeding, is enthralling. Of course, the Fringe really is pointless, but that is surely its charm too. Kurt Vonnegut said we are here on earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different. The Fringe is the epitome of farting around. It's a magnificent waste of time that everyone should experience.
Edinburgh Fringe 2008 runs from tomorrow until Monday, August 25th