TALLINN:With its centuries-old streets, towers and squares, this year's European City of Culture gives visitors a fascinating insight into its past, writes ADAM ALEXANDER. Some tourists like it so much, they stay for good
EVER SINCE Tallinn began as little more than a wooden fort on a hill next to the sea, everyone it seems has wanted a piece of it.
First came the Danes who captured Tallinn in 1219. Then the Germans, then the Swedes, and last but by no means least, the Russians. Which all in all makes probably the most remarkable thing about the perfectly-preserved 11th-century medieval centre of the city the fact that it’s still even here: it has survived, among others, the less-than-delicate attractions of Ivan the Terrible, Adolf Hitler, and Josef Stalin.
Within moments of landing, I was soon in the mood to take over the place myself. Homely cafes and inviting restaurants along the cobbled streets were offering cappuccinos and cake for less than €2, and full proper meals for only a fiver.
And no sooner had I popped into one of Tallinn’s most popular bars in an effort to try and get into the spirit of things, than a strikingly beautiful woman working there informed me it was happy hour, and proceeded to force two pints of lovely local beer on me for the price of one, all for less than a half pint would cost back home.
No wonder then, legend has it, that some years ago a group of Scottish football supporters came to Tallinn to see their team play Estonia, and after taking one look at the local women and at the price of everything, decided to move here.
But then, there is more to life than beautiful women and cheap booze, as they are no doubt still happily finding out, and far more to Tallinn, this year’s European City of Culture, as well.
Indeed, inside the storybook medieval centre of centuries-old streets, houses, towers and squares, it was already proving to be a fascinating if slightly bizarre world of foreign embassies and marzipan museums, modern Spanish tapas bars and olde-worlde Estonian pubs, Thai spas and former KGB headquarters, that left me almost confused about quite how to go about my invasion first.
One thing was sure though, the ubiquitous number of Irish pubs also here were not nearly as tempting – the Dubliner, O’Reilly’s, St Patrick’s and Molly Malone’s to name at least four that I saw – which just made me feel too depressingly like the last Viking to get off the boat.
THANK GOD then for my first big meal at the Olde Hansa medieval restaurant just off the main square in the old town, where a delightfully dark, candle-lit feast at a long wooden table successfully managed to keep on the right side of kitsch, and much more in keeping with Tallinn’s magnificent olde- worlde surroundings.
Onion jam, quail’s eggs, rabbit roast and ginger turnip were just some of the delights that kept coming and coming. And, trust me, if you’ve never had marinated bear, elk and wild-boar sausages washed down with dark honey or cinnamon beer, and served to you by a woman in a buxom dress who describes herself as a “wench”, you haven’t really lived.
A tiny pepper schnapps at the end of the meal then sent me back into the snowy minus-9 degree temperature outside again, happier and perhaps even better insulated than a child full of chocolate Ready Brek.
Not quite in the mood yet to get naked with the locals in one of the many local saunas, beat myself with prickly juniper branches, and then charge from 100-degree heat into ice cold water – as I was reliably informed they do here – but damn-near almost.
Whatever I did next though, I was already sure it would be only “around the corner” in this incredibly-compact city of only 400,000 people, which is the other beauty of Tallinn – the fact that you couldn’t get lost here if you tried.
So easy to get into, around, and out of, that not only is it hard to think of a better, more convenient weekend break capital in Europe, but after the five- to 10-minute ride into town from the airport, it is perhaps one of the places that Ryanair has ever got its passengers this close to where they actually wanted to go.
THE NEXT day though, I was taken beneath the city into the long network of underground tunnels that over the centuries helped keep Tallinn one of the best defended cities in northern Europe, where it did seem entirely possible to get lost.
Instigated under the enlightened rule of the Swedes who, as the tour suggests, ushered in a Golden Age for Tallinn because they “knew how to run things”, these same tunnels centuries later provided the only refuge one terrible night as a Soviet bombing raid inflicted perhaps the worst ever damage in Tallinn’s long and sometimes bloody history.
Mercifully, the medieval-quarter survived largely unscathed though, and Tallinn – a vital port – is now a richly-deserved Unesco World Heritage site. But the real result of repeated invasions by such good-looking, industrious races of people as the Danes, the Germans, the Swedes, and the Russians, have left their mark, as you might well imagine, in other ways on Estonia’s attractively-blended and extremely-capable population.
After nearly 50 years of rule by the Soviets, which only ended in 1991 with Estonia’s delightfully inspiring “singing-revolution”, perhaps a little psychological damage still remains.
Nowhere is this more obvious than inside the KGB listening room hidden for years on the top floor of the Hotel Viru – Tallinn’s first skyscraper, and one of the Soviet Bloc’s first tourist hotels.
Still a working hotel, but now also a museum on the absurdity of life under the Soviet system, this is a fascinating look at how one of the biggest lies ever pulled on the human race – the conceit that the Soviet Union was the best place to live in the world and not in fact the worst – was maintained by an evil system willing even to plant fake purses in empty rooms that would explode indelible paint onto any hotel staff tempted to open them. Never mind also sending beautiful female agents to foreigners’ hotel rooms to pump them for information.
But the most useful thing about history is what it teaches you about today, and following so many years under the eyes and ears of the KGB, no wonder Estonians are slightly reticent about opening up, wonderfully friendly in character but understandably still a touch guarded and maybe not yet entirely trusting of their neighbours .
It took a government of their own to finally deliver a more authentic socialist utopia, and in the country that has since given the world Skype, not only is wireless internet provided everywhere for free these days, but it is almost expected as a kind of human right now.
No wonder then that despite my efforts to try and find out if there was anything that Estonians had to complain about their lives now, the only thing they could think of to tell me was how slow their government is at clearing away the snow . . .
It was still snowing as I finally had to leave, but I had already decided I would come back in summer when a whole new outdoor experience of Estonia promises to come to life. Then, among the beaches, forests and summer meadows that this tiny but fascinating European country also has to offer, there’ll be absolutely nothing to complain about I’m certain.
Get there
Ryanair (ryanair.com) flies from Dublin to Tallinn. Air Baltic (airbaltic.com) flies from Dublin to Tallinn via Riga.
Tallinn where to . . .
3 places to stay
Value:Sokos Hotel Viru, 4 Viru väljak, 00-372-6809-300, sokoshotels.fi/en/hotels/tallinn. Stay here and experience what was Estonia's first skyscraper, and one of the Soviet Bloc's first ever KGB-run hotels. But don't expect them to send any female agents to your room, those days are gone. Doubles from €73.
Mid-market: The Merchant's House Hotel, 4/6 Dunkri, 00-372-6977-500, merchantshousehotel.com. Brilliantly located hotel just off the main square and right opposite old Tallinn's only microbrewery, just in case you get home and forget to have that last pint. Doubles from €95.
Upmarket:Hotel Telegraaf, 9 Vene Street, 00-372-6000-600, telegraafhotel.com. This five-star luxury hotel in Tallinn is located in the medieval old town next to the Town Hall Square, which dates back to the 13th century. In 1878, it was an exchange station for the Estonian Telegraph company. Doubles from €165.
3 places to eat
Value: Restaurant Neh, 4 Lootsi 00-372-6022-222, neh.ee. This restaurant is run by Estonia's top chef who is also the chef at Padaste Manor, the country's renowned five-star island spa resort. Here, a two-course lunch is €13, three-course dinner €22, three-course Sunday lunch €17, and a four-course chef's table for five, €225.
Mid-market:Restaurant Tchaikovsky, Hotel Telegraaf, 9 Vene Street. 00-372-6000-610. Get past the hyperbole that this restaurant delivers a "symphony of Russian cuisine", and you have a very, very fancy restaurant that is third place in the top 50 restaurants to eat in Tallinn, and as good as any Michelin-star dinner, but with one major difference. The cost – with dishes such as "Duck breast with honey grapes, potato puree and tarragon" – is €20 or less.
Upmarket: Olde Hansa, 1 Vana turg, 00-372-6279-020, oldehansa.ee. Not the cheapest place to eat in town, but for a feast that could set you back about €35, you'll have onion jam with duck foie gras, quail's eggs, rabbit roast and ginger turnip; never mind marinated bear, elk and wild-boar sausages washed down with dark honey or cinnamon beer.
Shop spot
The “Sweater Wall”. Along the wall by the Viru Gate.
Estonia is famous for its knitting, and you will find more hats/sweaters/jackets/mittens and scarves here than on an Alaskan coat-rack stand. During the Soviet era, the “Sweater Wall” became well-known as the place where ordinary women sold their knitted items from stalls. It’s still there, and so are the women, but any attempt at haggling will still be met by a curt Soviet-style “Nyet”.
Hot spot
Hell Hunt Bar, 39 Pikk, 00-372-6818-333, hellhunt.ee. With the name “Hell Hunt” and a sign showing a naked woman riding a wolf, the last thing you expect inside is a warm, trendy pub whose chilled atmosphere pulls in plenty of locals and tourists alike. The local beer on offer is excellent, too, and if you’re hungry, check out how big – and cheap – the menu is.
More information
See Estonia Tourist Board’s website, visitestonia.com, and Tallinn Tourist Office’s website, tourism.tallinn.ee.