Michael Kellystays at the Scotsman Hotel, Edinburgh
WE ONCE DID an Edinburgh weekend on the cheap. You know the type - low-cost airline, comfortable-but-dull three-star hotel - and, no, we don't want a second bottle of wine, thanks. We loved the city but couldn't help thinking the meagre budget didn't do it justice. For our second visit we figure it is only right to posh things up a bit. Let's be honest: we all need a little pampering at times.
If you're looking for a perfectly romantic luxury HQ, then the five-star Scotsman Hotel is just the job. From the moment a cheery doorman welcomes you and the porters whisk away your bags, you know you've arrived.
Part of the Eton Collection of boutique hotels, the Scotsman is centrally located, dominating North Bridge and just a few minutes' walk from the Royal Mile and Princes Street. It opened in 2001, in the baronial building where the eponymous newspaper was produced for more than 100 years.
All too often, luxury hotels stick to tried-and-tested formulas and are therefore too alike to be memorable. Not so the Scotsman: it is brimming with a character that is all its own. Apparently, when the newspaper's printing presses were cranked up each day to produce the following day's issue, the building would shake. Thankfully, life is quieter now, but the building's unique history has not been forgotten, and a newspaper theme has been cleverly retained throughout; the menus, for example, come in the form of a newspaper.
We stay in an enormous Editor's room on the corner of the building, looking over Princes Street Gardens. "Many journalists were fired here," says the porter with a glint in his eye as he drops our bags. Gulp. Surely not a bad omen.
Our room is bright and cheery, with a huge bed and the obligatory widescreen TV. Muted Ballindalloch tartan furnishings and walnut panelling conspire to create an opulent yet comfortable atmosphere. The minibar has been stocked by someone with a sense of humour: cans of Irn-Bru are provided (presumably in case your car runs out of antifreeze).
The room also comes with a Monopoly table (with Edinburgh street names) and a "privacy hatch", so the room-service waiter doesn't have to disturb. A lavish breakfast and a newspaper - the Scotsman, what else? - appear each morning as if by magic. The bathroom is equally splendid, with antique bath and shower, and Cowshed toiletries.
By day we are reluctant to leave the room, but the Cowshed Spa, in the hotel's Escape Health Club, is enough to entice us out the morning after our arrival. Mrs Kelly indulges in a facial while I have a full-body massage - a first for me, and an experience I have to admit I sleep through most of. Perhaps that's the point. Both treatments last 55 minutes and cost £60 (about €75) each.
I swim in the slightly freaky pool to refresh myself afterwards. I say freaky because it's made of stainless steel, so it's hard to tell when you're coming to the end of a length. After crashing into the wall a few times I give it up as a bad job and retire to the jacuzzi.
If you want to leave the hotel, which I suppose you should, it is an ideal base to explore the Scottish capital from. From the front steps turn left and cross North Bridge and you are in New Town (a spot of shopping at St Andrew Square or an uberhip lunch at Valvona & Crolla's VinCaffè, on Multrees Walk?). Turn right and you're in Old Town and a stone's throw from the Royal Mile, St Giles's Cathedral, Greyfriars, Edinburgh Castle and Holyrood Palace.
The Scotsman has got rid of its fine-dining restaurant, Vermilion and revamped the more casual North Bridge Brasserie, a restaurant and bar in the former newspaper's lavish reception hall. It's a lively, comfortable spot, and we thoroughly enjoy our meal, which can include lots of Scottish produce, such as Loch Tarbert scallops and Perthshire Lamb.
The Scotsman isn't cheap, and unless you have deep pockets in your kilt it's probably best to avoid in August or at Hogmanay. But if you are looking for an indulgent winter break, imagine sitting in the Editor's Reception Room in front of a warming fire, enjoying a coffee and reading the paper while the Edinburgh winter does its worst outside. Go on, you know you want to.
WhereThe Scotsman, 20 North Bridge, Edinburgh, Scotland, 00-44-131- 5565565, www.theeton collection.com.
WhatFive-star hotel boutique hotel in the centre of Scotland's capital.
RatesA standard room will set you back from £130 (€165) to £350 (€445) B&B per night, depending on season. Editor's rooms or Publisher's suites cost £285-£500 (€365-€635) B&B per night, depending on season.
Food and drinkDaily buffet breakfast at the Club Room; lunch and dinner at the hotel's North Bridge Brasserie.
AmenitiesEscape health club, Cowshed spa, private screening theatre.
ParkingIn a nearby car park at a reduced rate. Ask at reception.