The youngest member of our extended family received a kite for Christmas. And yes, you begin to appreciate the problem: while there were a few potential kite-flying quarters of an hour during the festive season (mostly in the middle of the night), the weather, by and large, was kite-unfriendly.
It reminded me of a version of the Beaufort Scale I came across some years ago, and which I have quoted here in Weather Eye before. Admiral Sir Francis Beaufort, you may recall, achieved his place in history by devising the scale of wind force which bears his name.
Although it was formally adopted over 150 years ago, the Beaufort Scale is still in use with only minor variations. It is familiar to most of us - in general terms at any rate - from the shipping forecasts broadcast on the radio.
The scale is defined in terms of the effect of the wind on the surface of the sea, or how it affects trees, buildings, people, and so on, over land. The specifications, however, have a subtlety which makes them difficult to assimilate at first glance.
Conscious of this difficulty quite unforeseen by the good admiral, a Mr Geoffrey Ball decided - tongue in cheek - to repair this deficiency; he submitted to Weather, the monthly journal of the Royal Meteorological Society, a "Revised Beaufort Scale" which defined the various strengths of wind as follows:
Force 0 - (Calm) Children want Dad to fly new kite.
Force 1 - Reading a newspaper out of doors becomes a problem.
Force 2 - Reading a newspaper out of doors becomes impossible.
Force 3 - Twigs by the front window begin to tap on glass.
Force 4 - Side gate bangs in the middle of the night if someone forgot to put the catch on.
Force 5 - Old gentlemen's hats blow away.
Force 6 - Clothes lines come down, dragging newly-washed sheets on muddy grass.
Force 7 - Side gate bangs in the middle of the night, even when it has been carefully bolted.
Force 8 - (Gale Force) Car steering appears to have gone awry.
Force 9 - Old ladies' hats blow away.
Force 10 - (Storm Force) Clothes lines with newly-washed sheets take off into next-door's garden.
Force 11 - Old ladies and old gentlemen blow away.
Force 12 - (Hurricane) Children want Dad to fly new kite.