It was lunchtime last Tuesday in Dublin's O'Connell Street and Bertie Ahern was doing a quick interview before attending an engagement, writes Miriam Lord.
The thorny question of his tax affairs came up and, in particular, when would he be able to produce a tax clearance certificate? The Taoiseach stood in front of the cameras and the microphones and explained the situation. He seemed very relaxed, and set out the situation without a hint of hesitation. It doesn't happen too often these days, but Bertie can do coherence when he wants.
"The position taken by the Revenue is that they can't finalise it until Mahon's work is finished. That's fine by me. I have no difficulty with that." For once, he was a model of clarity, leaving no room for doubt.
The situation regarding that certificate was, he said, "simple". Bertie was taken at his word. Much as he would love to prove his compliance by waving that cert, the matter had been taken out of his hands by the Revenue Commissioners, who wanted to wait until after the tribunal.
And so we move on a week. The Dáil is back after the Christmas break. (January 30th, and people are meeting in the corridors and wishing each other a happy new year. Honest to God.) Seven days - it's not a long time in Irish politics, when the Christmas holidays go on for six weeks. But it's a long time in the timespan of Bertie Ahern's ever-changing financial fairytale.
By yesterday afternoon, the Taoiseach was standing in the Dáil chamber and trying to remember what he said in the last few weeks about his tax affairs.
As for his blinding moment of clarity in O'Connell Street last week, that's all it was: a moment. A snapshot in time, as his fellow politicians like to say.
Bertie didn't know where he was yesterday. Did he really say that the Revenue didn't want to address his tax obligations until after the Mahon tribunal had reported? Eh, yes, Bertie.
Sure as night follows day, that's what you said. We were there. You were definite about it. Couldn't have been more sure of yourself. Convinced us anyway.
Labour leader Eamon Gilmore is a little less trusting. He asked the Taoiseach if the Revenue Commissioners had actually confirmed to him that they were waiting for the tribunal to finish before considering issuing his tax clearance cert? This time, clarity went out the window.
The man who stood before the media last week and confidently explained the situation was gone. In his place, a mumbling bumbler who made little sense.
Eamon Gilmore was left baffled after his reply. "I think I'll have to check the record of the House to unwrap the quadruple negative," he marvelled after Bertie finished speaking.
Here's what he had to say yesterday about what he had to say last week about his tax certificate. That's if he said what he said then, because he's not too sure.
"It is not correct. If I said so, I wasn't correct, so I can't recall if I did say, but I did not say, or if I did say it, I didn't mean to say it, that these issues can't be dealt with until the end of the Mahon tribunal," he began, in apologetic tones. "That is not what the Revenue said. What Revenue said, that they were in the part of the normal process with dealing with these issues and that in the meantime, under the law and they and both the Public Offices Commission believe that there, it is a similar in law, that you do not get a tax clearance cert, that they deal with the other process while the issue is ongoing, and hopefully these issues will be cleared up as soon as Revenue can do so."
Well, you can't say fairer than that, Bertie.
He had just executed a U-turn of monumental proportions, but it took him so long to get around the bend, most people listening to him forgot where he had started out from in the first place. Which was the general idea.
Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny didn't know what to say. It took him about 10 minutes to get his head around the Taoiseach's latest fling with the English language. Finally, having sat, paralysed, in his seat for some time - you could almost see the little wheels going around in his head - Enda piped up: "Eh, in terms of clarity, I didn't actually catch what you said . . ."
Bertie generously repeated what he said earlier. He made a bit more sense this time. In fact, it is possible Revenue can resolve the issues surrounding his tax affairs at any time.
"It is an ongoing matter," explained the Taoiseach.
"If I did say it was being resolved at the end, I shouldn't have said that," he said, with a rueful grin.
So why did he, and his Ministers and his spin doctors, say it in the first place?
Sinn Féin's Caoimhghín Ó Caoláin, faced with Bertie's verbal gymnastics and stunning turnabout, was stricken enough to be moved to brevity. "There is a credibility deficit," he intoned.
Another amazing display from the Taoiseach. He's worth every penny of his pay rise - eight months and counting, lads.
It was discussed again yesterday. Again, Bertie showed his selfless side.
The independent review body wanted to compare his duties and level of responsibilities with similar executives in the private sector, he pointed out. In calculating his worth, they "would have put my salary up at €600,000, if they had been allowed to do it".
Bertie wouldn't stand for it. "Not that I needed that, I can tell you," he told a gobsmacked Opposition."
So the review body thought again. No €600,000 for the Taoiseach.
"They didn't do it, thank God. I wouldn't have taken it." The man's a saint.