Campaign trail

An election miscellany compiled by Shane Hegarty.

An election miscellany compiled by Shane Hegarty.

The Sopranos gets whacked

RTÉ has bumped off The Sopranosso it won't clash with the leaders' debate.

The last series was due to kick off on Thursday night, but will now be shown on Thursday, May 24th, instead, which is the night of the election. Often described as the "greatest television drama of all time" its arrival on to RTÉ2 had been eagerly anticipated - not least by RTÉ, which has been promoting it for weeks. However, the national broadcaster seems to have decided it would be unfair to expect viewers to choose between a gang of ruthless, power-hungry good-for-nothings on one channel and The Sopranoson the other.

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Two other programmes have been postponed from this week. I'm An Adult, Get Me Out of Herefeatures young people struggling to find a property in an inflated housing market and Soupy Normanis a Polish soap opera that's been rewritten and revoiced by Irish comedians, so was sure to be a valuable contribution to the immigration debate.

Quote, unquote

"He must have kept everything over the years. I have trouble finding my dry cleaning tickets."

- Fianna Fáil handler on the Taoiseach's detailed statement on his finances

Your candidate needs you!

Fiona O'Malley's campaign is being conducted with military precision: literally, in the case of the language used to mobilise her "foot soldiers".

The PD TD is scrapping for her seat in Dún Laoghaire, and an e-mail has been sent to canvassers in advance of a major leaflet drop. "Operation Dawn To Dusk" features "tactics, objectives and logistics" to be organised by "lieutenants" and "foot soldiers".

Lieutenants are "to provide morale (and any stimulants) for your soldiers". The reward for a foot soldier, meanwhile, is nothing less than salvation, according to the mail: "A foot soldier is guaranteed a place in heaven as Operation D2D can be used to purge your soul of the sins of not attending other parts of the campaign. One night to cleanse your soul."

The e-mail ends on a rousing note: "It's a war out there. May your God be with you." All cases of trench foot and louse infestation are to be reported immediately.

The gloves are off

North Dublin Fianna Fáil candidate John O'Leary has been making great play of his status as former Dublin goalkeeper. He is, voters are informed, North Dublin's "No 1", and the constituency is "in safe hands". But it appears that some people are still nostalgic for one of his predecessors. In Balbriggan somebody has scribbled out his name on a poster and written: "Paddy Cullen."