CALLS FOR the introduction of a bylaw to restrict the height and width of headstones used in graveyards have been deemed insensitive by a Cork family who claim a "circus" has broken out since a 4.7m (15.5ft) high, 6m (20ft) wide memorial was recently erected to their late father.
Earlier this week, Cork Fine Gael councillor Joe O'Callaghan said he planned to put forward a motion at the next meeting of Cork City Council, after a large memorial gravestone with "gates of heaven" and multiple statues, estimated to have cost €50,000, was erected at Kilcully cemetery on the north side of Cork city.
Yesterday, the family at the centre of the controversy said they were within their rights as no bylaw exists restricting the size of headstones in Cork city. Breda Kiely, whose father Tommy was a horse dealer, told Cork's 96FM radio station they were very hurt by the negative media attention the headstone received this week.
"We are very private people. My father would not want this type of carry on. We were well within our rights. There is no height restriction. We have done nothing wrong. My father worked hard and earned an honest living all his life. My father was a horse dealer and he helped everybody and he was a pure gentleman. We are travelling people. My father was a proud Traveller and I am a very proud travelling woman myself. The reason it [the headstone] is so big is that we are different, we are unique - we are travelling people."
Ms Kiely said the horseshoe on the headstone represented her father's love of all things equestrian. She insisted the headstone was a work of art and that her father deserved more than the "circus" he received.
"That is my father's resting place. He should have been allowed rest in peace. He never imposed on anybody. I am very upset. He [Mr O'Callaghan] should have come to us in private and spoken to us like human beings."
However, Mr O'Callaghan has expressed concern about the safety implications of the headstone as it is has a narrow base.
He also says the Kilcully graveyard is a "showplace of tranquillity" and the headstone is completely out of character with other graves.
"I don't want to upset anyone, but it is a question of public safety. It is so big quite honestly. I am asking the environmental engineers in the council to assess whether there is a danger of winds catching it - it is so big it could topple over.
"I understand that people want to mark and honour the grave, but there has to be consideration also of the fact that there are thousands of other graves there. People have been on to me continually about it." Mr O'Callaghan says he plans to put down a motion to introduce a bylaw to have a general rule of thumb about the size of headstones.
Meanwhile, various councils across the country have imposed or plan to impose regulations to reduce pressure on the bereaved "for bigger and better" headstones.
Earlier this summer, Limerick County Council acted on large headstones erected without permission in local cemeteries. Council workers removed a large crucifix erected on top of a headstone in Reilig Mhúire graveyard near Askeaton.
Talks are continuing between the council and a Kilmallock family over a marble and granite monument erected over a family grave.