The punters' - and the politicians' - favourite races start on Tuesday.Frank McNally weighs up our love affair with Cheltenham
It seemed like sarcasm at first, so Labour's Derek McDowell had to assure the Seanad on Tuesday he was serious in asking why the Freedom of Information Bill had been scheduled for its important committee stage next week, when everybody knew the Minister responsible was unavailable. "It's not a frivolous question," he insisted.
The reason Charlie McCreevy would not be available was, of course, the Cheltenham Festival. And far be it from anyone in Leinster House to regard this as frivolous. Indeed, the Oireachtas will be represented at the race meeting when Arctic Copper, owned by a cross-party syndicate of centre-right male politicians such as Brian Cowen - the reported motto is "no women, no socialists" - takes his chances in the Mildmay of Flete Handicap Chase on Wednesday.
Arctic Copper, who has been running for parliament for several years, is described as a very honest horse by syndicate member Maurice Manning.
"He always tries, and he's rarely out of the placing," the former senator adds. So much so that Manning is casting aside his normal reserve and advising friends to take advantage of the horse's 20-1 price: "I think he's a very good each-way bet."
McCreevy is not a member of the syndicate and may take a prudent view of Fine Gael-sponsored financial advice. But he will be at the meeting - Cheltenham's, not the Dáil committee's - and could probably argue that his attendance is in the line of duty for a Minister for Finance. When you discount about 20 per cent for the naive optimism that takes hold of Irish racing at this time of year, the festival is a useful barometer of confidence in the economy.
Not surprisingly, Cheltenham 2003 is reflecting the general downturn. Leopardstown Tours, one of a handful of companies that specialise in the 5,000-strong pilgrimage, says demand is about 10 per cent lower than normal. "We thought it might be down 15, but it's been a bit better than that," says a spokeswoman.
The trip doesn't come cheap. Those travelling have paid anything from €499 for flights, transfers and three nights' modest B&B in Cheltenham to €1,259 for a similar package involving a top hotel. One smaller operator, Slattery Travel of Fermoy, is carrying about 140 people on its Cork-Bristol charter, most of them paying €740 for a deal that will see them stay in Bristol and make the 50-minute daily journey to the track by bus.
Economics aside, the foot-and-mouth crisis of 2001 may still be having an effect on numbers travelling. The 2000 festival, when Istabraq won his third Champion Hurdle, was probably the high point of Irish involvement, coinciding with the peak of the boom.
After the cancellation of 2001, some of the annual pilgrims had "lost the rhythm", according to the Leopardstown Tours spokeswoman. They'd lost some of their leisure time, too. "Everybody's busier now," she adds, so the company also does a brisk trade in day trips. "We're completely full for those."
The cost of flights and accommodation is only part of the outlay. None of the prices includes the entrance badge to the racecourse, for example. There are cheaper versions than this, but the three-day "club badge" - de rigueur for the self-respecting - costs £180, or about €260. Downturn or no, the badges sold out in January.
Cheltenham's tourism office is reticent about the inflation that grips the town at this time of year. "Rates shouldn't be higher, and we don't encourage it," says spokeswoman Sue Adie.
But the three-day splurge is clearly a pillar of the local economy. The 50,000 daily race-goers spend £4.5 million, or €6.5 million, to get in and a whopping £20 million - more than £1 million a race - in bets.
Accommodation is scattered over a 25-mile radius, but the bars, restaurants and shops of Cheltenham alone benefit to the tune of £11.25 million. Some of the more conspicuous consumption includes an estimated 30,000 bottles of champagne and 250,000 pints of beer.
For bookmakers back in Ireland, Cheltenham is the equivalent of Christmas in a lingerie shop. John O'Reilly, the chief executive of Paddy Power, says the week is worth "eight or nine Saturdays" in turnover, not counting the ante-post betting that starts the day after each year's festival ends.
Despite the lore associated with the likes of JP McManus, the big gamblers are no more active at this time than any other; maybe less, as the races at Cheltenham are the year's most competitive and, by extension, the hardest to predict.
But bookies' wallets are swelled by the once-a-year punters caught up in the hype. And in a festival that has become an Anglo-Irish grudge match, at least for the Irish, the patriotism of punters who should know better also contributes.
The going at Cheltenham rarely suits Irish horses, and the many trainers praying for rain in the Cotswolds will probably have to settle for the course's prediction that the ground will be on the easy side of good. But hope springs eternal, and O'Reilly admits there is some truth in the suggestion that national chauvinism is good for the bookies' bank balances. The Irish bookmakers' worst result this week would be a Gold Cup victory for Michael Hourigan's Beef Or Salmon. During his meteoric rise to fame, the inelegantly named horse has been backed from 40-1 to 7-2 for steeplechasing's greatest prize, and only the defending champion, Best Mate, is now better fancied. But asked if it follows that Irish bookmakers will be cheering for England on Thursday, O'Reilly is coy.
"We like to see punters doing well." Ominously for the bookies, Beef Or Salmon is apparently indifferent to ground conditions.
But for many, the Irish banker is Moscow Flyer in Wednesday's big race, the Queen Mother Champion Steeple Chase. This is despite the horse's ropy jumping record.
Indeed, at one of Ireland's many Cheltenham "preview nights" - events in which jockeys and other experts expound on their prospects before audiences of intelligence-gathering punters - Moscow Flyer's pilot Barry Geraghty was advised by a rival to "bring a parachute". In broad terms, this is good advice for all prospective gamblers in the coming week.
And here might be a good place to introduce the standard disclaimer used by financial institutions. Anyone persuaded by this article to back Arctic Copper on Wednesday should remember that, at Cheltenham more than anywhere, the value of your investment may fall as well as rise.
Festival countdown: SportsSaturday