The instance of multiple births is "increasing rapidly in Ireland", according to Dr Roy Philip who runs the multiple birth clinic at the Rotunda hospital in Dublin. Fertility treatment seems to be contributing significantly to the increase. While it is still uncommon, the instance has increased dramatically, with triplets in particular becoming more prevalent.
Coping with a first baby is quite a challenge - imagine having four of them all at once. Mary Bennett is the mother of David, Sarah, Aoife and Kate, all nearly six years old. "Well, it was an awful shock when I found out," she says. "I was 11 weeks pregnant and four babies showed up on the scan. I have to admit, it wasn't what I wanted at the time. I couldn't believe it."
The babies were born at 33 weeks, all low weight, and kept in hospital for six weeks. "It was very hard travelling up and down from Kildare to Dublin every day to feed them and take care of them in hospital," she says. "And when they got home, we found the only way through was to stick to a really strict routine. "I made up 20 bottles a day. I had to have someone in to help during the day, and at night my husband and I were up feeding together. It was very hard work, non-stop feeding and changing, but you actually feel guilty - you feel you haven't enough time to give each of them the sort of one-to-one attention a baby alone would have".
Jeannette Brophy set up the Irish Multiple Birth Association two years ago to provide information and support to parents.
"I had my twins in England nearly eight years ago and there were both state and community support services available," she says. "When I came back here a couple of years ago I found there was nothing. A few of us got together and we held our inaugural meeting two years ago. We now have 250 members. "There are currently 1,400 multiple births a year, and it is increasing. Long term you're looking at significant impact on State services such as health and education. Meanwhile, parents have an awful lot to deal with and very little back up from the State."
Brophy has twins, Sinead and Mathew. "I was about eight weeks pregnant when I found out. Initially I was stunned, but it was certainly very useful to know early. I got the chance to meet other parents with multiples and get prepared. For a start we had to buy a new house - which is quite common. Parents suddenly find their home is far too small and they either have to move or start building extensions.
"In England the state provided substantial home help for the first four months, and my friends and family were great. It is tough going, and it can be particularly tough for siblings. People are so excited by so many tiny babies coming home, they come to visit and barely say `hi' to the older brothers and sisters. "We advise parents to tell all visitors to make sure to stop and speak to siblings first - and bring them along a present too."
Nicky Molloy, mother of four-month-old triplets Katie-Louise, Sophie-May and Rosie-Jane, is still smack bang in the thick of non-stop feeding and changing. "I have someone coming in during the day to help me," she says, "and we just have to be extremely organised. They've just started solids, and they don't like to sit around waiting! "I always hold each child as I feed her, because multiples can easily end up missing out on chances for one-to-one attention. Then if one of them is awake while the others sleep, I give her as much cuddles and chats as I can.
"Bath time is an epic adventure. It takes a good hour and you need two people on the job. Going out shopping too; there's no way I could do it on my own. And people are enthralled, so you spend a considerable amount of time stopping the buggy for a chat - pretty much the same chat over and over!"
As the children grow older and more independent, the pressure eases. But parents have to think through difficulties which may arise at school.
Mary Bennett's children are not identical, which means they don't stand out at school. "They are all in separate classes, and people often don't even know they are quadruplets," she says. "It is really important to foster independence among them. "They do get on fantastically at home and they have great fun together, but one child can become the most domineering and it means the others don't necessarily get the opportunity to develop their sense of self, or their social skills."
According to Jeannette Brophy, it is essential not to look at multiples as "a unit", nor treat them all as if they are a particular type. "It is important to encourage independence," she says, "but parents should meet with the principal to discuss each individual child and how to meet their needs. Some may be ready to be separated and to go to separate classes, but that may not be right for all children. "There is no point having a particular school policy. Schools should have guidelines which take into account individual needs. My children have very different personalities and interests - they know they are little individuals, but they also know they are twins, and they see it as something special."
Contact
The Irish Multiple Births Association can be contacted at PO Box 5053, Swords, Co Dublin (tel: (01) 845 1087).
