THE BIGGER PICTURE/Shalini Sinha: I am originally a child of the bilingual Canada. As such, whenever I flew Air Canada, I always remember a real sense of relief and belonging as I heard the words, "Welcome to Canada. Bienvenue au Canada" spoken sincerely over the intercom on our return.
Four years after immigrating to Ireland, I noticed my breath catch and a warmth rise in my heart as I flew Aer Lingus home from Turkey and heard the words, "Welcome to Ireland. Tá fáilte romhat na h'Éireann." Ireland had grown into me and I had grown into Ireland.
Since I've moved here, I've learned a lot, grown a lot, and also shrunk a little.
I can see how Ireland's history has deeply affected everyone on this island, and it has affected me, too. I have learned to be cautious about myself, to keep my head down and to feel somewhat insignificant.
I moved here in 1996 - welcome the Celtic Tiger. This Tiger came and went, leaving this country changed forever. While our politicians only speak of the "positives", the gap between the rich and poor increased and people became more isolated, working longer hours away from loved ones.
In the last 15 years, the social network of Irish society has broken down more than ever. This Tiger has brought with it a ravenous consumerism - convincing us that we are lacking something without which we are less loveable.
Stunned with inadequacy, we are told this one product will make us complete. If the plan is working well, we'll neither feel complete nor notice we've been lied to. We'll hang there in a state of limbo and buy the product again. We'll walk around like zombies, numbed out and separated from each other. We need only look across the Atlantic, to the heartland of consumerism to see the effects on bodies and minds.
This upturn also brought with it is a sense of "forget the past, the famine is over". Still, now more than ever, Irish people need to remember their past.
The oppression against you was violent and merciless. I can guess a little of what it might have felt like because I know how my own people survived their oppression. Irish people resisted persistently over hundreds of years, looking for fair treatment and justice.
When your leaders became visible, you saw them rounded up and killed. You learned, through a collective traumatisation, to survive by keeping your head down and everyone in line.
History leaves a real legacy in society. The largest group identified in the British mental health system seems to be Irish women.
Back on this island, many of us come under considerable social pressure if we try to act against the grain - take a stand against alcohol, for instance. As a nation, we are afraid to encourage each other, and so, it is difficult to trust each other with either our dreams or our doubts.
We use hurtful comments to keep each other down because we've fooled ourselves into believing this is affectionate and somehow shows our closeness. We keep those we see as "not Irish" at a distance, believing they would never understand us, and never trusting them to fight for us.
In the process, we forget how important our group of people are and how essential it is to the world that we are strong and visible.
Good mental health demands that every human be allowed to take pride in their significance, and so be free to take risks and express themselves completely.
Every time we are discouraging, judgmental or humiliate someone for doing things in new or different ways, we keep ourselves and our society from thriving and moving forward.
While Irish people deserve to be pleased with each other, it is difficult to change the patterns of our past without planning and persistence. If we struggle with fear, rejection and a reliance on drugs to function, then it would be useful to see warmth and acceptance when we look out.
More profound, however, is the fact that for us to show this to others would require us to decide to act outside of our learned reflex to be small and unnoticed.
We would need to really believe in the value of an Irish person and the impact we could have on the world.As we approach St Patrick's Day, it is time to pull in those people we really love and show them our vision for Irish people and the world.
It is time to share our experiences of trauma and violence, and leave them behind - not because we ignored them, but because we didn't.
It is time to stand tall and show even strangers we meet what is possible when we mirror back real love. And while it will probably take a while before we feel comfortable doing this, it will make us genuinely powerful.
Shalini Sinha is an independent producer, counsellor and journalist. She is a counsellor on equality issues. She has lectured on Women's Studies in UCD and co-presents Mono, RTÉ's intercultural programme