The Bigger Picture: Everything in the world is temporary, and that includes where you are in your life now. You may not believe you have the power to change things, but you do. You could decide right now to stop eating biscuits, start exercising, clean up your house, change your job, pursue a relationship, even journey to another part of the world!
There is nothing permanent about the state of your body, health, surroundings or routine. Everything can be transformed. Everything is being transformed.
Each step we take takes us somewhere. Even when we feel we are in a rut, every moment we don't decide to face into it and take a risk, actively digs us into a deeper rut. The question is not "are you moving?" but are you choosing where you are moving to?
If you started right now with one small step, in time your life would be quite different. It is possible. There's nothing to really stop you from having a life that expresses and fulfils you more genuinely, except your own sense of how much you value yourself.
For many people, choices around personal health are the most difficult ones to make. We struggle deeply around the look, shape and state of our bodies. We feel so badly about it, we can't seem to believe we could look or feel anyway differently.
And yet, we were each born with beautifully shaped and designed bodies, wonderfully toned muscles, bright attractive expressions, a will and a purpose to move and make use of ourselves. So what has happened to that wonderful specimen you have?
The idea that the state of our bodies could change - and change for the better - has, for some reason, become impossible to us. I say "for some reason" with purpose: there is always some reason why we lose our sense of belief in ourselves.
It is not true that human beings are not naturally hopeful, enthusiastic, strategic and willing. Our intelligence may be fragile, but it is intelligent nonetheless.
We are a species that naturally embraces change. This must be true, because we instigate a lot of it. We are continuously trying to figure out how to improve things, make things better, and eliminate problems. We thrive on challenge, growth and learning. For proof of this, spend some time with a very young child - one who hasn't been tortured or discouraged. You will find in them an endless will to keep practising new skills, an in-depth attention to learn about the people and world around them, and a joy they get from simply trying new things. They have a natural respect for themselves, and we see it in how they behave.
Something happens to us to make us give up on ourselves, and it happens shockingly often. Most people today are struggling to really believe in a purpose or value for their self. Our actions reveal our lack of self-respect.
We rarely see ourselves as agents of change. And while more often we will be able to muster some hope or will to try to change someone else, we seem to lack this power for ourselves.
In this, I think the idea of leading by example becomes important. While there are times when it is necessary to challenge or interrupt someone else's behaviour - if it is acting out upon you in unjust and inappropriate ways - what makes a real difference in our lives is those moments when we can challenge and interrupt our own struggles.
It is more important when we can realise how someone else's behaviour leaves us feeling less valid, where we have a problem, and what needs transforming.
I have found that it's rarely effective to make changes with the hope that someone else will see it and so be moved to respond.
Comparing ourselves to or trying to impact on someone else rarely gives us any help. However, when we focus on what is important to us, fulfilling that in our lives becomes (ironically) very influential. We become stronger where we need it. In doing so, our own life takes off.
This is seen. It becomes apparent. It is attractive. It has profound influence. It provides hope. It has no strings attached. Most of all, it has nothing to do with trying to change those around us. It's funny how this ripples out and becomes effective.
When our attention is on our struggles, we can't do anything. It is too overwhelming. We become caught in humiliation. When our attention is off our struggles - and on what is important to us, what we do well, where our humanity lies and what we want - we can gain the space we need to take action and make changes.
The more we manifest what we truly value, the more confidence and self-esteem we will have, and the more loving we will be able to be - to ourself and others. By loving and encouraging ourselves, we can transform anything. We can change our bodies. We can change our surroundings. We can change our lives. The rest, then, will take care of itself.
Shalini Sinha has established Forward Movement, a clinic where she practises life coaching, the Bowen technique, and is training in nutritional medicine.