Ill-feeling at start of health debate

Dáil Sketch/Miriam Lord: For appearances sake, to take the bare look off the month, deputies rushed back to the Dáil after their…

Dáil Sketch/Miriam Lord:For appearances sake, to take the bare look off the month, deputies rushed back to the Dáil after their Christmas break a full week earlier than required.

One and a half extra days at the coalface - a huge sacrifice. But did they complain? Well, yes.

The first words spoken in 2007 were words of protest.

The honour fell to Fine Gael's Fergus O'Dowd, who was terribly put out to find he would only be allowed to speak on the Health Bill for 10 minutes.

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Given that his running mate in the general election is mile-a-minute Maireád McGuinness, the sitting TD for Louth needs all the time he can get.

Fergus tried to make his pitch.

"If I am only allowed to speak for 10 minutes . . . " he began, a definite hint of threat in his voice. Sadly, he didn't even make 60 seconds before the Ceann Comhairle cut him off at the knees.

Yesterday's debate would not be ending today, explained Rory O'Hanlon. Rather, it would be merely adjourning, to be concluded at a later stage when, presumably, Fergus will be able to blather on to his heart's content.

Health Minister Mary Harney waited patiently to begin her contribution. For her sins - and judging by the ire of the speakers to come, they must be many - she was forced to sit in the chamber all day while the Opposition informed her the health service was a shambles.

But not before Labour's Emmet Stagg, a source of more complaints than a doctor's surgery, got in with his first whinge of the new year.

"As a point of order, I wish to inform the House that the Labour Party did not agree to these sanitised proceedings," he harrumphed.

The moment Emmet erupted, the Ceann Comhairle was out with his bucket and mop and swept him out of order. A secondary outbreak was sanitised with clinical ease.

"Why were members of this House excluded from the launch of the National Development Plan?" huffed Deputy Stagg. He was ignored, and the debate proper got under way.

There was an early frisson when Ms Harney accused her Fine Gael opposite number, Dr Liam Twomey, of telling a lie.

The spat arose when the Wexford deputy said a ministerial adviser had been seen shouting at a health executive employee about hospital procedure.

The former tánaiste bridled, and came out with the "L" word. A scandalised Ceann Comhairle demanded an immediate retraction. Without batting an eyelid, Mary declared she had never accused Liam of lying. She merely said his information was not correct.

And everyone was friends again.

Until sex reared its ugly head.

"The Minister should be man enough to follow through on what we were talking about," said Liam, accusing her of stealing Fine Gael's ideas but not fully implementing them.

Labour's health spokeswoman Liz McManus was in full agreement, except on one point. "It would be good if the Minister was woman enough - being man enough is not as good."

That's telling them.