Today there was a funeral for a 16-year-old boy. We can’t name him. And we can’t name the church or the town. There’s a lot that can’t be said because of a quirk in the law.
The pandemic restrictions had already added to the cruelty of the situation with just 10 of the many people who loved him permitted to attend the funeral service. But a whole community was grieving. Outside the low redbrick church, hundreds of people gathered to show their love and respect under the grey sky.
People stood around the church gates, along the road and across the street on the green. There were people of all ages but there were, notably, hundreds of young people, some crying. Some wore white hoodies with an image of boy on it. Some wore black t-shirts with an image of the boy and the date of his death. Some t-shirts had the words “Forever Young” and some of the hoodies read “We will cherish your smile.” One woman held balloons in the colours of his football team. One man had “RIP” and the boy’s name stencilled on his car. A couple of people held up cards with the boy’s photograph and the words “died a hero” typed underneath.
The boy’s coffin arrived in a white horse-drawn hearse pulled by two white horses. Another rider rode ahead of the hearse on a black horse which was draped with a flag bearing the boy’s name and a picture of him on the football field. Behind the hearse walked some of his relatives and over a hundred young people. The boy’s football teammates, in their team jersey, lined up in a sort of honour guard as the hearse came into the church grounds.
A bagpiper played Raglan Road as the white coffin was lifted from the hearse and carried into the church. It was followed by the boy’s mother who was surrounded by close family members. Two children, the youngest relatives, were holding brightly coloured teddy bears.
Outside the church, everyone watched a livefeed of the service on their phones. The boy’s football team remained standing in their positions, like guardsmen. People huddled together in small groups and comforted each other. Drops of rain began to fall.
The priest began the service by inviting some friends to bring up personal items to represent the boy - his football jersey, his boots, an energy bar and a bottle of Lucozade. On the livefeed it wasn’t possible to see the whole family but occasionally the little girl with her pink teddy bear could be seen coming into view. As the singer sang Be Not Afraid you could hear the sound of crying. The priest did the readings himself as “it would be too much for the family to come up and read today.”
Dark cloud
In his homily the priest spoke of the “dark cloud” that came over the community when the news of the boy’s death reached them. He spoke of the immense tragedy for the family and the outpouring of grief and support in the community. The boy had, he said, “A huge circle of friends and he would charm the birds off the trees with a smile and he’d charm the non-feathered birds as well.” There was sad laughter at this.
He recounted anecdotes about the boy’s kindness. In school as a small boy he always wanted to make sure people were okay. As a teenager he regularly supported friends who were in trouble. The priest spoke about how loving he was and how loved he was. He would always be a “shining light”, he said.
Later the boy’s team manager said a few words. On behalf of the family, he thanked the fire brigade, the ambulance service, the gardaí, the funeral directors and the local community.
He told stories. He talked about how the boy would always step in on his mother’s behalf when his siblings squabbled. “The lads would say, ‘Oh yeah Golden Balls can get away with it but we can’t.’” He talked about the boy’s favourite haircut which he called “the dangerous fade” because “the birds would have to be aware he was on the prowl.” He talked about how over Christmas the boy would start his day by wearing his mother’s pink morning coat which eventually lead to a “tug-of-war” over the coat until it ripped. Each story was greeted by sad laughter and murmurs of recognition from the unseen congregation. He spoke of how immensely talented the boy was and how loved he was by his teammates. He said they would keep his memory alive.
At the end of the service, a singer sang Forever Young. When the family and coffin came out to the church yard, there was no real opportunity for people to give their commiserations to the family but hundreds of people stood in silent support. The boy’s mother was comforted by loved ones and while they prepared to leave the small children were each lifted up to have a go sitting on the black horse. As the funeral cortege left the church an entire community clapped and hundreds of people followed them out onto the road.
