An episode that would have stretched the imaginations even of the Father Ted writers illustrates how Sister Gertrude Joyce shared something of her brother James's sense of humour. She colluded in arranging an earthquake to get rid of an unpopular monsignor.
Even now, all these years later, the recollection amuses Father Feehan, as became clear during our conversations. It is easy to understand why. He first heard about the incident in the summer of 1952 when he met "the horse's mouth", Father Jimmy Houlihan, another Tipperary man.
Father Houlihan and parish, Greymouth, where Father James Long, from Limerick, was The parish, on the more remote, if beautiful, west side of New Zealand's South Island, was a haven for visiting priests. It also attracted a certain monsignor from Christchurch, who announced he was staying for a week, possibly two. Which was fine, until he refused to help out by saying morning Mass while his hosts visited remote parishes.
He was on holidays, he said, and didn't want the burden of any pastoral duties. Unfortunately, however, he also inquired about the likelihood of earth tremors while he was there. The area had a reputation for earthquakes.
This was inspiration for Father Houlihan and Father Gregory, a New Zealander. Annoyed by the monsignor's behaviour, they decided to make the earth move. They began with psychology. At mealtimes the conversation was directed to earthquakes and the instability of the area, with horrific stories of previous experiences. This continued for a couple of days.
A short time later, as the monsignor was taking his constitutional after lunch, the two curates carried sackloads of stones and bricks to the attic, placing them by a trapdoor in the ceiling of the monsignor's room.
That evening, after more talk of earthquakes, the monsignor announced he was going to have a bath and then retire early. While he was in the bath, Father Gregory took up position in the attic and Father Houlihan got under the monsignor's bed. And waited. They had decided the earthquake would begin as soon as their visitor was in bed.
When the monsignor returned to the room, he began, much to Father Houlihan's discomfort, to do exercises on the floor, although luckily he didn't see his future tormentor lurking beneath the bed. He got into bed and switched out the light, the cue for all hell to break loose. Which it did.
Father Houlihan gave the mattress above him a few spasmodic lifts, then increased the frequency. Stones and bricks began to fall from the ceiling. The monsignor screamed and fell out of the bed, which then turned over on top of him. Father Houlihan overturned the dressing table as he escaped from the room.
Extricating himself from the "debris", the monsignor ran roaring along a corridor, where he was met by the parish priest, who steadied him and took him for a strong "drop" to steady his nerves. Father Long, who was au fait with what was going on, assured the monsignor he had sensed something of the tremors beforehand and so had not gone to bed himself, just in case.
"There could be worse to come," he said, matter-of-factly.
The monsignor had had enough, and said he was leaving Greymouth on the first train the following morning. He was reminded he had already arranged to say Mass that morning in the Mercy convent next door. The Superior there, Mother Vincent Maguire, a Cavan woman, and Sister Gertrude Joyce were to join the monsignor for breakfast afterwards.
Both had been primed about the "earthquake" and regaled him with more terrible stories of earthquakes past, and the likelihood of further tremors following the one the night before. The did so casually, explaining that they were used to it all.
Thus encouraged, the monsignor duly got his train later that morning and, when he got back to Christchurch, it is said he dined out on his terrible experience for some time afterwards. He even addressed the girls at a Dominican convent there about the earthquakes of Greymouth.
Father James Feehan has written about his conversations with Sister Gertrude Joyce in his book An Hourglass on the Run, the story of a preacher (published by Mercier, £9.99)