THE PRIEST who "shocked" a sex abuse victim in 1985 by his reaction to her reports of assaults on her by a chaplain at Our Lady's Hospital for Sick Children in 1960 has replied to a letter from her which was published in The Irish Times yesterday. He has asked that his identity not be disclosed.
"I deeply regret the abuse that happened to the person who writes in The Irish Times today. The woman in question and her family were well known to me for a number of years while I was curate in their parish. Moreover I had no reason to believe until recently the extent of the trauma she had suffered. Like many others, I admire her courage in telling her story.
"I regret also that she has such a pain-filled memory of her meeting with me in 1985. I want to say that my recollection of that meeting is different. As I remember my main concern at our meeting was to assure her that no guilt lay with her and that any guilt she thought was there was easily forgiven. I am aware that people who have suffered abuse often carry with them a great burden of unjustified guilt and shame. I wanted to do anything I could to lift her burden of guilt from her.
"I know also that, given the seriousness of the matter, I would have been concerned to ensure the truthfulness of what I was being told and I inquired if she wanted to divulge the name of the priest concerned. But I was aware that this might cause even more anxiety so I pointed out quite firmly that 1 did not need to know his name.
"I also said that if I did know it,
I would have to have the matter investigated further. In my mind, the issue of the name of the priest involved was, I felt, not a part of dealing with the hurt of the person who was before me or of relieving any feelings of guilt she might have had.
"I have had some experience in dealing with pastorally-difficult situations and with people who are hurting. For that reason, I am saddened and sorry my true concern and desire - that healing would occur - did not convey itself to her.
"It is painful to recall the differences in our perceptions when I know the sincerity and the pain with which she now tells her story. I am clear in my heart and mind that I would not willingly have caused her to feel she was to blame for what had happened.
"I did not reply to the letter which was addressed to the Archbishop and a copy of which was sent to me. This was because the matter was now in the hands of the church authorities and I felt it better to leave it to them. I also felt it unwise at the time to go and meet with her, much as 1 might have wished to, but I believed the matter was now out of my hands.
"I realise now that, had I done so, I might have brought her more peace of mind. I apologise if in failing, to do so, I added to her hurt.
