PRESIDENT Clinton is today regarded as the "King of the Bikinians", the people displaced from their South Pacific paradise atoll by US atomic bomb tests 50 years ago. The island, which gave its name to a skimpy French swimsuit with atomic effect on males, could again be a tourist paradise - as long as you do not eat the coconuts.
The Washington lawyer representing the interests of the 2,200 Bikinians told The Irish Times that while "Protector" might be more accurate, it was true that the islanders see Mr Clinton as their king.
It was traditional for the inhabitants of the Marshall Islands of which Bikini is a part, to ha ye an outside king or mu. Since the US government had moved them off their island while promising to care for them, they regard Mr Clinton as their iroig, responsible for their welfare.
They need protection, the lawyer, Jonathan Weisgall, said, because of "the tension" with President Imata Kabua of the Marshall Islands, who has demanded they build him a luxury home in the capital.
The President of the Marshalls, which became independent in 1986, also claims to be the "paramount chief" of the Bikinians and entitled to one-third of their revenues. They hope Mr Weisgall can prevent him from getting his hands on the $100 million trust fund set up after a long legal battle to clean up Bikini and let the islanders return there.
Mr Weisgall believes it will take another decade before the islanders can go back. Lyndon Johnson declared the island safe in 1968 and the Bikinians went back, but some years later they were found to be in danger of radioactively poisoning. The soil was contaminated with radioactive caesium 137 which plants like coconuts absorb, and once again the islanders had to be evacuated. Now there are proposals to make Bikini safe using the money in the trust fund, scraping the top 16 inches of radioactive soil, but this raises the problem of disposing of it.
Mr Kabua is not happy with the refusal of the Bikinians to build him a house in his capital. "I'm going to sue them," he said, and then used an expletive. Now, that's no way to treat King Clinton's loyal subjects.