VLADIMIR Wolfovich Zhirinovsky is running for president of Russia on June 16th. He won't win, but his candidacy could have an important bearing on who does and, in any event, he doesn't want to be president and has said so unequivocally on a number of occasions.
The joker in the pack of 11 candidates doesn't believe Russia should have a president at all and he has expressed his views on the subject in the following manner. "Russia is an empire. It cannot be a humiliated republic with a rotten democracy, a declining economy and a weak army." What the country needed, therefore, was a tsar and the man known in the west as "Vlad the Mad" was prepared to do the job.
According to Russia's notoriously unreliable opinion polls Zhirinovsky is likely to get about 5 per cent of the vote according to those who conduct the polls he will get more. "We have never got Zhirinovsky's vote right before and neither have the other opinion polls," Alexander Yadov, of the VTsIOM polling organisation, told The Irish Times.
Opinion polls in Russia are usually conducted by telephone and therefore are biased towards the opinions of those who live in larger cities, particularly the reformist bastions of Moscow and St Petersburg. Zhirinovsky's support is in smaller cities and rural areas. Yadov also believes that many of Zhirinovsky's supporters, when contacted by polling organisations refuse to give their true opinions and are inclined to put themselves down as followers of President Yeltsin.
The "Zhirinovsky Factor" is therefore, a major one in distorting the polls, all but one of which show Yeltsin building a lead over his main rival, the communist candidate Gennady Zyuganov.
It is more likely the two are running neck and neck.
But what would happen in the unlikely event that Zhirinovsky does win and installs himself in the Kremlin as tsar? He promises greatness for Russia and trouble for the West.
While the main news bulletins on Russian TV have been flooded with pro-Yeltsin propaganda each candidate does get some "free time", usually at off peak hours, to give his views. Most read dull manifestos to a bored audience but Zhirinovsky livens things up.
"When Clinton arrives here and smiles, remember he is our main enemy. And those embracing him are his friends. That means they are our enemies," he tells the viewers and goes on to list the main foes as the United States, Nato, Turkey and China.
Russia's friends, according to the broadcast are Iran, Iraq, Libya and India, although it is not recorded how the Indians feel about being placed in such company, especially as Zhirinovsky once promised that Russian soldiers would wash their boots in the Indian Ocean.
On the campaign trail he has placed the blame for Russia's woes on democracy which, he said, had succeeded where Hitler failed.
"It has split Russia in two and has destroyed the Soviet Union.
Addressing himself to what Russians consider to be the country's three main problems the war in Chechnya, crime and the economy, he advocates drastic solutions.
On Chechnya "There will be an evacuation of all civilians from Chechnya and an ultimatum will be issued to the gunmen `Lay down your arms or you will be destroyed. Blue smoke from rockets and shells will twine over Chechen villages and over the whole of Chechnya."
On crime "Those arrested for any form of hooliganism will be shot to death on the spot."
On the export of capital "The relatives of those who have left Russia with large sums of money illegally will be arrested and detained until the money has been returned. This extreme measure seems quite logical. It is being widely used abroad."
In recent days, incidentally, Zhirinovsky was named by an Italian prosecutor, Alfredo Ormanni, as being wanted for questioning in relation to the illegal export from Russia of nuclear bomb making materials including red mercury, osmium and plutonium.
Shrugging off the accusations, he contends that he is the only candidate capable of putting Russia back on its feet. Yeltsin is "too tired and needs a rest" the communist candidate, Zyuganov, is "nothing but a party functionary who does not think about Russia but cares about his own interests instead" the Liberal candidate, Grigoiy Yavlinsky, "made a big error in his youth by becoming a boxer in the city of Lvov, a mistake that has affected his mental abilities."
These remarks, it should be noted, represent a "toning down of Zhirinovsky's image to present himself to the electorate as something of a statesman. In previous campaigns he has advocated that Russia should take back Finland, which was given its independence by "the wimp Lenin", and should even attempt to regain the lost territory of Alaska.
