David Adams: Even though the citizenship referendum drives a horse and carriage through the Belfast Agreement's assurance that Irish citizenship is open to anyone born on the island of Ireland, I suspect, whatever the outcome, that the option will still remain open to Northern Protestants like me.
Admittedly, I'm unable to boast of a parent "who has been lawfully resident in the State for at least three of the last four years" (as per the Government's referendum criteria), but my family has resided on the island of Ireland for something in the region of 170 years. Surely that should be enough for any government.
But they're not the only people who seem obsessed at the moment with what the necessary qualifications are for someone to be deemed fully Irish. For instance, descended as I am from Protestant planters, I suspect my claim to historical residency wouldn't cut much ice with Mr Gerry McGeough. Even if I did become an Irish citizen, I doubt that he or those who define Irishness in similar terms would particularly cherish me as a child of the nation.
A former member of Sinn Féin's national executive and a convicted IRA gunrunner, Mr McGeough has recently defected to the anti-abortion, anti-immigrant camp of European election candidate Mr Justin Barret. A self-styled "Catholic patriot", McGeough told the Sunday Independent he sees the "deluge" of immigrants into Ireland today as being directly comparable to (and presumably just as unwelcome as) the Protestant plantation of 300 years ago.
Quite how he manages to square his proclaimed "old-style Irish republicanism" (Protestant, Catholic and Dissenter etc?) with a seeming antipathy to two of the three groups Tone wished to unite - or even his oft-stated "pro-life" position with IRA gunrunning - isn't immediately clear.
But no matter, except to say that, if Mr McGeough's views are any measure of popular opinion, then maybe I shouldn't bother mentioning the forefathers after all. And, judging by an ongoing debate on this paper's letters page, I definitely shouldn't.
That argument, in case you have missed it, has revolved around whether or not the writer Elizabeth Bowen should be considered as Irish. Those who wish to posthumously deprive her of Irish status cite her "crimes" as: lending support to the Allies during the second World War; and, if any further proof of pro-Brit tendencies were needed, being a bit aloof with her neighbours.
Poor old Elizabeth's transgressions were as nothing compared to the antics of some of my predecessors. I'm not sure how they got on with their neighbours, but my grandfather did serve in the first World War, and various uncles actually fought for the Allies during the second.
And to crown it all, as it were, each was decked out in a British army uniform at the time. I suppose, while I'm about it, I should admit as well to being quite friendly with Dr Martin Mansergh.
In the normal run of things, being friendly with Dr Mansergh wouldn't matter one way or the other. But, with even his Irish credentials being subjected to a certain amount of critical inspection in recent times, we being friends probably wouldn't do either of us any favours. How times change.
Not so long ago, any benign traveller who landed up in Ireland was welcomed with open arms. If, after a while, they or their progeny proclaimed themselves to be Irish, it was taken as a compliment, if not quite a cause for celebration. But not now.
With the bona fides of even homegrown people like Elizabeth Bowen and Martin Mansergh being scrutinised by self-appointed purity police (we're all Irish, but some are more Irish than others?), it's hardly surprising to find there's little in the way of a welcome on the doormat for the poor immigrant.
The new arrival, if the opposite isn't immediately obvious, is considered a freeloader or, as Mr McGeough might put it, a "scam-monger". It's a bit rich from a people who, Protestant and Catholic from North and South, have for centuries not only settled every part of the globe, but boasted about it as well.
Whether running from poverty (economic migrants?) or escaping religious and political persecution (asylum-seekers?), the Irish have never been slow about upping sticks and moving somewhere else. But the Celtic Tiger changed all that and unfortunately brought more than prosperity with it.
Like the neighbour who has had a sudden upturn in fortune and future prospects, all of a sudden Irish memories have become short, and airs and graces have been adopted. And, again like that upwardly mobile neighbour, people have chosen to forget when, in the not too distant past, they, too, had no arse in their trousers and were only too glad of a welcome on someone's doormat.
As for those who think there has ever been such a thing as a politically and/or religiously homogenous or ethnically pure Irish people: they must be complete strangers to a proper history book.
And, just to set at rest the minds of those who yearn for such a society: I've no intention of applying for Irish citizenship.