Sir, - I am sure I speak for all decent Irish lads when I register my reaction to the recent decision by the Dublin Circuit Civil Court to award damages of £30,000 to Mrs Tara Elwood, wife of rugby international Eric. I wish Mrs Elwood well and my response is based purely on the way The Irish Times (February 20th) chose to report the matter by leading with: "Ireland rugby out half Eric Elwood has to do daily household chores since his wife was injured in a car crash three years ago, a court has been told". This includes poor Eric having to do all the ironing, hoovering and washing of floors.
The way in which your report was framed, the biggest shock of all was that the court did not decide to award the damages to Eric instead of Mrs Elwood. Did the judge not see Eric limp off the field against England? Oh yes, the public were told that he took an early knock in the match having injured his knee in training. Truth is, though, he banged it on the hoover!
It was bad enough that such a glorious specimen of Irish masculinity was reduced to doing such womanly chores in the first place. But the (real) men of Ireland have been further affronted by the (male) judge's decision. We must thank god that there are still some (real) men in The Irish Times (and there's Kevin Myers too) who are (literally) man enough to expose the contamination of the natural gender order of things and men's lives by what Harry Browne referred to recently as Ireland's "radical feminist judiciary". - Yours, etc.,
Department of Applied Social
Studies,
University College,
Cork.
PS: Is there any truth in the rumour that the real reason Nick Popplewell cried off the Scotland match was because he injured himself while cleaning the toilet? After all, props do tend to get all the bum jobs.