Standing face-to-face, one-on-one, in town hall debates would be just the place to start, writes QUENTIN FOTTRELL
WHO BETTER to introduce dirty tricks into the American presidential race than those political desperados: the Republicans. They currently have an ad of Barack Obama with images of Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, and another comparing him to Charlton Heston's Moses in their "Audacity Watch", to supposedly portray Obama as "the biggest celebrity in the world". But John McCain is actually targeting the worst red state, blue collar stereotype, presenting the first black candidate with two white blonde women - one an accidental porn star, the other a Lolita pop starlet - and mocking him as a biracial, self-styled Messiah.
Republicans have been gagging to bring up race. Obama told a crowd in Missouri last Wednesday he does not look like he is from central casting or the folk on the American dollar. Seeing their big chance to burn Obama, the McCainiacs accused him of playing the race card, leaping on this innocuous comment like a group of arsonists to a lighted match. They are smarting at the success of Obama's overseas adventure. But just because McCain has no style, struggles to give a press conference without cue cards and spent an entire week without taking a question from the travelling press does not mean he has substance. McCain says he is "proud" of his Britney/Paris campaign. (Kathy Hilton, a Republican contributor, called it "frivolous".) Clearly, he has been given a list of words to use when asked questions - and "proud" is top of that list. It is an attempt to distinguish the strong Republicans from effete Democrats. They jumped on the word after Michelle Obama said, "For the first time in my adult lifetime, I am really proud to be an American". (Note: she said "really" proud.) This is the Republican's Verbally-Challenged School of Politics. The theory being that the Democrats cannot be proud of their country if the Republicans get to that word first.
However, if a septuagenarian can be "proud" of a campaign with two 20-something blondes and a fake Moses, this is a pride that is out of touch with reality. Obama, as the saying goes, can only be stopped if he is found in bed with a dead woman or a live man. Yet McCain and his campaign managers have gotten into bed with two live women and a dead man. Metaphorically speaking, of course, though neither Britney nor Paris gave their consent for their images to be used. These girls have enough hordes of sweaty photographers who feed off their every misstep and trip to rehab and prison. Must McCain join them?
Obama does still have image problems. Starting sentences with "Look . . ." or "Listen . . ." does not help the perception of him as arrogant but, like the archetypal ex-wife, Hillary Clinton knocked the edges off him before kissing him goodbye to make way for another Democratic running mate on his dance card. I love what's she's done with him! It was her greatest parting gift. All their domestics have tested Obama's ability to think on his feet, and have made him a smarter, more even-tempered and all-round fitter candidate. But the McCainiacs are desperately attempting to paint Obama's good health as another negative.
They lied, saying Obama cancelled a trip to see wounded troops in Germany . . . in order to visit a gym. Plus, a memo accompanying McCain's campaign said: "Only celebrities like Barack Obama go to the gym three times a day." Obama has repeatedly said, "I'm skinny, but I'm tough". Should he be choking on "pretzels" - and that was the official story - like the current occupant of the White House? Or chomp Dunkin' Donuts and jelly beans like McCain? Death by hailstorm of a thousand barroom peanuts is designed to make Obama less appealing to Middle America.
Ignorance did no harm to George W Bush. It made him one of the boys. McCain is doing the same. He has already said he doesn't really understand economics. Which is more than he knows about international affairs. Last month, McCain said he was concerned about Russia reducing energy supplies to Czechoslovakia. In 2007, he said Czechoslovakia should have a missile defence system. In 1999, he thanked the ambassador of Czechoslovakia and, in 1994, suggested Nato should be expanded to include - you guessed it - a country that no longer exists. What next? A speech about the economic imperialism of the Roman Empire?
In the Republican Last Chance Saloon is a Norman Rockwell-style McCain, talking tough about Czechoslovakia, Iraq and jobs with blue-collar workers. (How early 1990s of him.) They paint Obama as a 1950s-style Gottfried Helnwein figure. But instead of Marilyn Monroe, Elvis Presley and James Dean in the diner, Obama sits alongside Paris and Britney. McCain gives new meaning to "Audacity Watch" with his sexually provocative, racially charged, dumbed-down subliminal ad campaign. When supporters say he is a "tough guy", they clearly mean he will stoop to any level to conquer. The swift-boating Republicans always have.
It is time for Obama to stop playing with his French fries, roll up his sleeves and fight back. Standing face-to-face, one-on-one, in town hall debates would be just the place to start."Ignorance did no harm to George W Bush. It made him one of the boys. McCain is doing the same