So that was the year that was. The Ashton-Whelan rift; the shingles-induced departure of Ashton; the sudden and much shrouded departure of Whelan; Wanderers' High Court case with the IRFU and re-drafting of the Division Two map; the belated professionalisation of the provinces; the brinkmanship of the English clubs prior to the off-on European Cup,; the drugs controversy; the Wood-Union rift over contracts, the IRFU's premature and unexplained withdrawal from discussions over a British (and now not Irish) League, etc etc.
Oh yes, and some rugby too. Not too much, but enough in another mixed omelette of a season to remind us that the pumped up, egg-shaped piece of leather may one day again be the primary point of the exercise.
January
Shannon overturn Ballymena with a last minute try which had seismic reverberations for both teams - especially Ballymena, who went from top of the table to mid-table with four defeats on the spin.
The gulf between Brian Ashton and Pat Whelan grows wider, ending in celebrated press conference at Sutton. "There have been differences of opinion but they have been sorted out. We did have one of two things to talk about," says Ashton. Far more revealing was the acerbic: "I'm professional; he's amateur. I'm English; he's Irish."
February
True to type, Ireland begin the Five Nations Championship with a 17-16 defeat to a limited Scottish side in Dublin. "I'm not quite sure whose game plan that is, but it's nothing to do with me," says Ashton, prophetically. Ashton contracts shingles. Then he resigns. Bookies offer 6 to 4 about Gatland as his successor. Gatland appointed the same day.
March
Gatland inherits poisoned chalice with handy little opener against reigning champions France, Ireland advised not to turn up, but by concentrating on the basics of up-and-at-'em defence and solid set-pieces, Ireland nearly pull of coup of decade. Go down by 18-16. Respect, but utter frustration. Ireland self-destruct against Wales, and go down creditably to England at Twickers. Another wooden spoon makes for three-in-a-row.
April
Ireland win FIRA World Youths' Cup in France with 18-0 win over France in final at Stade Touloussain. Shannon beat Garryowen in inaugural Lansdowne Road final for fourth AIL final in a row to earn title of Team of the Century.
May
Wanderers take on Union. No contest. Wanderers win. Remodelled second division, includes everybody. Reggie Corrigan, Gabriel Fulcher and Lansdowne take on Union for latter's daft (even for them) policy decision that all prodigal internationals must rejoin their last Irish club. (Or failing that, Cork Con). No contest.
Union lose. Wanderers label co-Lansdowne Road tenants as "Wanderers and Squanderers".
Provincial Cups are decided. Corinthians take no glee in beating Galwegians and so deny Eric Elwood his first Connacht Cup winner's medal. Paddy Johns is declared player of the year. Shannon beat Young Munster - it was cast in stone - and Lansdowne beat Skerries in Leinster. Ireland head off to South Africa and begin with six-try, 48-35 win over Boland.
June
Home-town refereeing, most notably in 12-6 Western Province defeat, add to aggrieved mood of Irish squad, and limit tourists to just one other win in seven games. Creditable defeat in first test in Bloemfontein, but Ireland have little to offer in second test save for fighting the good fight in Battle of Pretoria. 'Boks polish haloes. Say it was all Ireland's fault, for "frustrating" Bokkies.
"That's just an excuse," retorts Gatland. "What are we supposed to do? Lie down and capitulate? We're not here to do that."
Australia beat England (who go on to lose all seven matches on tour) by 76-0.
July
Hols. No rugby. Watch footie World Cup.
August
Tri-Nations winds up as Irish interpros kick off. 'Boks (on top of 96-13 win over Wales and win over England) go through Tri-Nations unbeaten. Irish tour doesn't look so bad. Within 12 months of being hailed as team of the century, All Blacks suffer worst season in half a century.
Interprovincials gradually wind up into being best ever, with Super 12 points scoring system and home-and-away concept.
September
Euro Cup kicks off without English. Who needs 'em. Sadly, Euro Cup does, but it gets along without them.
October
Munster time their season well, coming from bottom at half-way to win interpros. Also qualify for Euro quarter-finals, as do Ulster.
Keith Wood takes on the Union. No contest. The Union wins.
November
Ireland, England and Scotland have facile wins in kinda, sorta World Cup qualifying campaign over Georgia, Holland, Spain and Portugal. Ireland give decent go of it in legit fight with 'Bokkies. England deny them immortality.
December
AIL swings into action. Buccs shake a few feathers. Shannon stutter. Ballymena are quick out of the stalls once more, as are `Squanderers'. Ulster have greatest night in beating Toulouse for crack at Stade Francais in semis.
Awards List
Player of the Year: Paddy Johns. Ever present in Irish team and assumed captaincy from South African tour onwards. Played in Saracens' Cupwinning team. Enduringly excellent and honest toiler in coalface. Domestic player(s) of the year: Peter Clohessy/Anthony Foley.
Try of the Year in the AIL: Two minutes to go. Shannon trail Ballymena by a point. A lineout, Anthony Foley charges up the middle, ruck ball is moved on left and Billy O'Shea cuts inside James Topping for the match-winner. There were better tries, but none with more psychological fallout, and you sensed it at the time. Shannon's belief in their own invincibility was revived.
Scarred, Ballymena went into freefall.
Try of the Year for Ireland: Dennis Hickie intercepting Christophe Lamaison's pass to run gleefully from half-way and score by the French sticks. The hope of a momentous shock came vibrantly if fleetingly to life.
Quote of the Year: George Hook's valedictory reflections on parting of ways with Blackrock. "This was my 30th year as a rugby coach; a national, world and Olympic record. I've even outlasted Roly Meates, but I think that's it. I won't try to outlast Frank Sinatra."
