There they sat, the four of them, and a more smug lot you wouldn't find anywhere. A cosy cartel of soccer pundits, and their conductor, all singing off the same hymn sheet and offering the nation's couch potatoes the tasty morsels of wisdom that confirmed that, in Mick McCarthy's hands, Irish soccer is safe and apparently headed in the right direction. To Japan/Korea, we assume!
Live football on television has come a long way, even since Big Jack's glory days, but one thing it needs more than anything is some tension and, on Saturday, that was the biggest missing ingredient in the entire saccharine package.
Everything was so comfortable, almost so predictable, that the closest we got to raised blood pressure was when Liam Brady misinterpreted a point being made by Eamon Dunphy at half-time in Network 2's coverage. John Giles slithered to the end of the desk the three of them shared and Bill O'Herlihy thanked his lucky stars something was finally deflecting attention away from the gremlins that had him giving false lead-ins to clips.
But, like Ian Harte's goal, it was all over quick as a flash and it was back to the consensus delivered before the Ireland-Cyprus match that this was a thoroughly professional performance.
Coming so soon after the tension and dramatics of the England match, and David Beckham's last-gasp equaliser that confirmed their qualification for the World Cup finals next summer, the fare from Lansdowne Road was like following an all-night rave with a visit to the vicar's tea party.
Earlier, on Sky Sports, Martin Tyler - and Scotsman Andy Gray, knowing that his own lot hadn't a chance in hell of making it to the Far East for their holidays next year, using the royal "we" to describe England's efforts - had started off in upbeat mood by reminding us Greece had never beaten England . . . that the Greeks had failed to win an away match in the qualifying campaign . . . and that Nigel Martin had never managed to keep a clean sheet at Old Trafford. But England were 1 to 7 favourites and, sure, this was going to be a real party.
As the match moved into injury time, though, he had changed his tune. Tyler described the "stomach-churning anxieties" being experienced by the English supporters in Manchester, adding: "It's not the end of the road of course, there's always the play-offs." To which Gray reminded him, "the game's not over yet."
And, when England got their free-kick just outside the penalty area, Tyler's voice suddenly pepped up. "There are certain moments of destiny," he observed before Beckham struck the ball to the back of the net.
Over on BBC, meanwhile, John Motson was typically to the point in confirming it was "a poor performance" from England while co-commentator Trevor Brooking observed it was a "rollercoaster ride. . . . a lot of work needs to be done between now and the finals."
The wise men in the RT╔ studio know their English football inside out and weren't afraid to give their tuppence worth. "They were lucky," exclaimed Giles. "They didn't play well at all . . . Beckham's free-kick covered a lot of cracks." While Dunphy, who felt Beckham hadn't always lived up to "his reputation (in the past) and changed big games, did that today".
It was probably the most animated they got in the studio before the Ireland-Cyprus match, probably because they knew, deep down, Portugal weren't going to slip up against Estonia in Lisbon - although RT╔ had Darragh Moloney on the spot just in case - and that the Irish were looking for a bit of history in going through the qualifying campaign without a defeat.
Another piece of history was delivered in the shape of Niall Quinn's record-breaking 21st goal for his country which, of course, had everyone delighted and excited. On Sky Sports, the real Frank Stapleton, not the AprΦs Match version, who was co-commentating congratulated Quinny on his goal and the RT╔ cameras had the foresight to focus in on him getting a pat on the back from the people in his sky-high commentary booth.
By half-time, and Ireland 2-0 ahead, the Network 2 pundits were cosier than ever. "It's a dawdle, isn't it?" asked Bill. "It's not really that interesting, it is a difficult match to enthuse about," admitted Dunphy. "Exhibition stuff," added Brady.
Everything was going smoothly, too smoothly, that the television gremlins decided to have a little fun with the boys. When Bill told the boys that they were going to see the Connolly missed header, they got the disallowed goal due to his hand ball in the area.
"I don't know if we are going to see that selection of misses again, ah ha, here they come," said Bill.
"This is Harte's goal again," said Giles, "but it is worth seeing again." And the gremlins were working again after the match. When Bill told us that an interview with player-of-the-game Niall Quinn was on the way, the technical hitches left us with nothing . . . and, like a true play-maker, Bill (probably fuming inside for being made to look like part of the AprΦs Match team) returned to the pundits to elicit their views on McCarthy's status as a manager.
And, to a man, John and Eamon and Liam were of the opinion that, with the resources available to him - "apart from Roy Keane, who is world class," said Eamon - McCarthy had probably done an even better job than Big Jack who guided the team to the World Cup quarter-finals in 1990. Thing is, Ireland haven't made it to Japan/Korea just yet - there's a play-off match to come.
Who knows where that will be or who it will be against, but one thing is for sure - there will be tension that day. And, when there is tension and something really at stake, that's when the RT╔ panel are at their best. As Tom McGurk reminded us from Donnybrook on Friday night after Leinster's Heineken Cup win . . . all for 23 pence a day!!
