Seven men booked and one sent off: the underdogs take the lead against their 10-man superiors, look as though they are capable of maintaining it but ultimately succumb to a rousing fight-back while having legitimate claims for a penalty denied: the referee is a pantomime villain, the crowd respond in seasonally raucous fashion: a goalkeeper - Shay Given - is sent off: the local hero scores the winner.
It would require a special supplement to do justice to the incidents in this game but the synopsis above may act as an indicator of an exhilarating afternoon on Tyneside.
The twists and turns were reflected in the number of times Ruud Gullit said "incredible" after the match and in Terry Venables's chipper demeanour even in defeat.
The Palace coach could easily have acted the "Outraged from Selhurst" role after seeing Lee Bradbury upended by Nikos Dabizas in the Newcastle area after 69 minutes with the score 1-1, only for Mike Reed to insist that this motorcade of a match sped on, whereupon Alan Shearer rolled in the winner 20 seconds later.
But Venables appeared as mesmerised as anyone else by the ever-changing show and said, without malice, that his mood would have been brighter only had the referee "been as courageous on the penalty as he had been on the sending-off."
The point was not lost on Venables that if Reed, who had already received intense abuse for dismissing Shay Given, had awarded a penalty for a challenge even Dabizas later admitted was a foul, he might now still be locked in a cupboard inside St James' Park.
Given's red card for deliberate handball well outside the Newcastle area after 15 minutes, though his connection seemed accidental, had stoked an already tense atmosphere into a hostile bawl of noise.
You get a more traditional Newcastle supporter on Cup days, the subdued season ticket-holders taking the game off, and Gullit was mightily thankful for the increased volume. "It was our 11th man and I would like to thank them for that," he said.
Significantly, Reed seemed swayed by the tumult that accompanied Given's exit and thereafter gave several 50-50 decisions Newcastle's way. However, one he had to give to Palace was their goal, Newcastle's substitute goalkeeper Steve Harper kicking the ball out of his net two minutes after coming on, Bradbury having nodded in Clinton Morrison's cross.
Facing a third defeat in a week, Newcastle looked to their new-found idol. No, not Duncan Ferguson, who may be out for two months: Warren Barton fashioned this resurrection. Shortly after half-time Barton's free-kick was chested down by Shearer and volleyed in by Gary Speed and with 20 minutes to go Shearer controlled a Barton centre to stroke in Newcastle's second.
There is not room to mention countless other chances at both ends but Gullit hoped this result was the start of a Newcastle revival. "What is incredible," he spluttered, "is that this club has been so unfortunate. There have been so many strange incidents there must be a curse on this club. We have to do something about this curse."
Asked how the curse could be eradicated, Gullit replied: "With a lot of faith. But no wizards." Newcastle United are going to need both if they are to return to Wembley.
Newcastle Utd: Given, Charvet, Hughes, Dabizas, Barton (Georgiadis 83), Solano, Hamann, Speed, Glass (Harper 15), Andersson, Shearer. Subs not used: Ketsbaia, Pearce, Brady. Sent off: Given (14). Booked: Barton, Speed. Goals: Speed 48, Shearer 69.
Crystal Palace: Miller, Jihai, Smith, Moore, Mullins, Foster (Jansen 50), Tuttle, Zhiyi (Linighan 75), Bradbury (Bent 69), Morrison, Rodger. Subs not used: Digby, Petric. Booked: Jihai, Foster, Zhiyi, Mullins, Linighan. Goal: Bradbury 18.
Referee: M Reed (Birmingham).
