Yesterday must be an occasion for hope. There can be no more hiding, no more prevaricating, no more refusal to accept the truth. England are now confirmed as the worst Test side in the world. Ten minutes after lunch, Alan Mullally, with a feeble-minded gesture of a man who wished to get the thing over with, lofted Chris Cairns to mid-on, Roger Twose taking a comfortable catch and the Test was over.
A day which had offered England a reprieve had fallen to New Zealand by 83 runs; indeed, it had surrendered to them with drunken abandon. New Zealand's 2-1 series win thrust England to the bottom of the Wisden Test rankings for the first time.
A pulsating Saturday's play had toyed with English emotions. New Zealand's second-innings collapse to 39 for 6, as Ed Giddins revelled in his Test debut, followed by a wonderfully vigorous counter-attack by Chris Cairns, left England 246 for victory.
On only eight occasions in Test history had a side triumphed by making the highest score in the match in the fourth innings; some challenge. But, at 91 for 2 on Saturday night, on a pitch which some imagined might be easing, England looked even money.
For almost an hour, Michael Atherton and Graham Thorpe were all composure. Atherton's perfectly-executed hook against Dion Nash to bring up his half-century suggested not only his own well-being, but that of England themselves.
With 32 added, Thorpe edged an outswinger from the lefthander Shayne O'Connor and Stephen Fleming, a first slip of rare excellence, held it low to his left. Nash then made decisive inroads. For much of the morning, he had looked relatively benign, but 15 minutes before lunch, he had taken three wickets for four runs in 12 balls, and England, 157 for 7 at the interval, were beaten men.
Atherton fell to an under-edged pull, and Mark Ramprakash, for once unable to bolster the lower order, followed first ball, touching a decent outswinger for Adam Parore to hold another catch.
Stewart hooked Nash to Bell at square leg before Caddick's demise before lunch, adjudged caught at short leg off Daniel Vettori's left-arm spin, brought squeals of delight from Kiwis among the crowd.
Irani's bumptiousness was England's final refuge, one robust drive against Nash providing sustenance over lunch. But the last rites were swift: Irani caught at the wicket off Vettori, and the run out, through sheer folly, of Phil Tufnell after Mullally had scooped Vettori to mid-on. For pity's sake, give up, we thought. And, in the next over, Mullally did.
