Des Lynam: "Highlights of the World Cup so far for you, Jimmy?"

Jimmy Hill: "Well, the Scots, bless their little hearts, have been very brave and have done their very best with such limited ability; the Nigerians, big strong lads, have come a long way, but they still have to learn how to defend sensibly, like so many of their Third World friends; Argentina have shown that they're continuing to recover from that thrashing we gave them in The Falklands; the Japanese players are such happy little people, they bring a ray of sunshine to the World Cup, if nothing else; the Germans are strutting around, thinking they own the place, but they've played quite well; the Jamaicans have brought . . . reggie (Des: "Reggae Jimmy, reggae"); and of course the Brazilians have proved that even if you come from an impoverished country with an hilariously large national debt it doesn't mean you can't play football."

Des: "And what's annoyed you, Jimmy?"

Jimmy: "Oh, undoubtedly, ignorant, arrogant television pundits who spend their time patronising anyone who isn't English in this tournament."

Des: "Right. Anything else irritated you?"

Jimmy: "Yes - the place is full of foreigners."

Des: "It is the World Cup, Jimmy."

Jimmy: "That's no excuse Des, no excuse. Something should be done about it. By the way, what do you love most about World Cup 98?"

Des: "That it's your last Jimmy, undoubtedly."

Meanwhile, Back In The Ratings War

ITV Producer: "Okay Bobby, we're (still) struggling in the ratings and we reckon we're losing out to David Ginola's sex appeal - we think you could be the man to take him on. Are you game?"

Bobby Robson: "Very much so."

Producer: "Okay. Try talking sexy."

Bobby: "Right. `Very much so, young lady, you're very much so beautiful.' "

Producer: "Try again Bobby."

Bobby: "There's no reason for me not to be unimpressed by your beauty. Bob. Very much so in fact. Indeed, when I look at your face I do not see any blemishes of minor importance."

Producer (Sighs): "Bobby, close the door behind you, and tell Kevin Keegan I want a word."

Bobby: "Very much so."

Three card trick

Denmark v South Africa - 3 reds, 7 yellow

Referee: John Jairo Toro Rendon (Colombia) - A 40-year-old industrial technician known for a tough streak - as Ecuador will testify having finished a qualifier in Peru with nine men. Just ask yesterday's two teams.

Two card trick

France v Saudi Arabia - 2 reds, 3 yellow

Referee: Arturo Brizio Carter (Mexico) - A 42-year-old lawyer with more than 20 seasons of experience as a referee. He took charge of the opening match of the finals four years ago.

Quote of the day

"My career is over. I will never be able to referee again at a top level. Everyone's talking about me. I've become the father of all refereeing mistakes."

- Referee Lucien Bouchardeau, from Niger, talking yesterday about the controversy surrounding his decision to award a penalty to Italy in their match against Chile, after a cross from Roberto Baggio hit Chilean defender Ronald Fuentes on the arm.

Patriotic ditty: No 7

Paraguayans, Republic or death!

It was our strength that gave us our final liberty

Neither tyrants nor slaves can continue

Where unity and equality reign

- an extract from the Paraguayan national anthem