Michael Duberry's decision to break his silence comes with a solitary, yet significant, condition. Before he takes part in his first major interview since the Leeds United footballers' trial, he dispatches a message via the club's press office that he wants it done on his terms. He will speak about football, he says, but anything else is off the agenda. Like it or lump it.
In the event, Duberry is more relaxed than would be expected and when the conversation strays, as it inevitably does, to those tortuous proceedings, any barriers that initially existed quickly come down. It is impossible, after all, to focus on his football without being drawn magnetically towards the courtroom drama that has engulfed his life and career. He speaks openly and frankly and, early on, confesses to being a changed man. "My outlook on life is totally different," he says. "I appreciate everything so much more now. Everything is seen in a different light." He speaks of his hope that he will soon be making headlines on the back pages rather than the front. "I just want to put it behind me," he says. Yet football's trial by ordeal is anything but over. In October he will have to live it out again when the retrial of Lee Bowyer and Jonathan Woodgate is heard. Six months after giving evidence at Hull Crown Court, Duberry may once again be required to take the stand as a witness.
In the meantime he must pick up the pieces of his career and discover for himself how, if at all, the whole affair has left him in the eyes of the Leeds supporters. Only time will tell how he is received, but it is something he intends to confront head on.
"The day after I left court it did go through my head that maybe it would be hard to stay at Leeds," he says. "But since then it hasn't been like that at all. I have been into the city centre, just walking around town, with no problem. I've had people who don't even watch football writing to me. There has been a ton of letters from all sorts of people." What Duberry has not seen is the stack of mail that has been vetted and disposed of by the office staff at Elland Road. "There have been all types of letters, I know that, but they all come to the ground rather than direct to my home address and the club have done a good job keeping the bad ones away from me. You are never going to please everyone, not in any walk of life, and there might be a minority who don't want me here. But that small minority won't deter me from wanting to play for Leeds United.
"Four days before the 10-week, £8 million sterling trial collapsed, Duberry was cleared of conspiracy to pervert the course of justice, a charge that had been hanging over him since Sarfraz Najeib, a 20-year-old university student, was beaten unconscious in a side street in Leeds city centre 18 months ago. Bowyer and Woodgate, along with two others, are charged with affray and grievous bodily harm. Legal restrictions forbid any further reporting about the original trial which was halted because of an article in the Sunday Mirror. The lawyers are watching.
"Something like a court case, you don't want to be reminded about it all the time but it's never going to go away properly, I know that," says Duberry.
"People want to talk about it all the time, that's just human nature. I haven't spoken about it publicly, so I guess people want to know how I feel about everything. But to explain what it was like, all the different emotions going through your head, it isn't an easy thing. I don't mind giving a general insight but when people ask me to go really deep into everything I don't find it easy. Not easy at all."
Before now, he has politely turned down all interview requests. "I haven't really wanted to do the press. At the time I deliberately didn't release a long statement and I haven't been in any of the tabloids with the big 'My Story'. I just don't think it's fair for me to be talking about it all the time. It was much better to walk away and keep my head down, lie low for a bit." It is clear Duberry has suffered but he has also learned a great deal about himself. "It's something that's hard to put into words but what I will say is that it can change your life. I love football and the lifestyle that goes with it but I know now that it's not the be all and end all. It's just a bonus to everything else in life. What I have been through teaches you that there are more important things out there."
What is certain is that, when Duberry returns to the first team, he will need every ounce of inner strength to cope with being under the microscope. "Last season was a test of mental strength but I've come through it and I'm stronger for the experience.
There's inevitably going to be a lot of focus on me but I don't feel under pressure," he says. "Let's not forget this is a nice way to earn a living. This isn't pressure. Pressure is waking up every day and not knowing where your next meal is coming from." And now for the rest of his life. Most of his summer has been spent rehabilitating from surgery - "sitting in court for two months didn't help" - after snapping his right Achilles tendon in a league game at Derby last September.
There has been no time for a long holiday and the opportunity, perhaps, to collect his thoughts away from public scrutiny. He managed a long weekend in New York with his girlfriend Nicola and there have been other social highlights.
He went to Ian Harte's wedding and Bruce Dyer's wedding. He has spent time with his two young daughters. Back in full training, now it is time to face the public.
"I don't think people will stop talking. They will always be asking questions. At the moment there has been no reason to talk about my football because I have been out for 10 months. But I'm feeling fit again and it doesn't faze me.
"All that is on my mind is getting fit and hopefully winning my place back. Watching from the sidelines last season the standard set by Rio (Ferdinand) and Dom (Matteo) was really high. I want to be challenging them again. This is a great club and, no matter what has happened, I want to be part of it. I really do."
