It was a good while back that a golf-obsessed acquaintance sent an email that simply included the following line: "We thrifty Scot nobs couldnae land near flag!" We replied along the lines of: "Pardon?"
It was an anagram, they told us, and our task was to work it out. There was, they assured us, a major clue in the anagram itself. Several hours later we thought we'd cracked it: "Softy twitcher snub canoodle fall and anger."
No, we were told, good try, but the correct answer was: "The Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St Andrews".
How uncanny is that? Almost, some of you might say, as uncanny as Mother-in-law (Woman Hitler).
Anyway. We returned to anagram-mode this week to see if we could come up with any more spookily appropriate word-jumblers, and naturally enough started with "Golf Masters". And naturally enough we weren't impressed with "Gormless fat". Much, much better was "The Irish Times Golf Masters", which gave us "Fathomless, tigerish merits", while "the overall leaderboard" quite fittingly transformed in to "Over-rated, adorable hell".
It was when we turned our attention to the 2007 Golf Masters' player list, though, that things became almost interesting. Here goes (we hope you have many free hours to spare): (1) Lumpy, angelic. (2) Goof on an ascendant razzle. (3) Nice burst. (4) Well graced memo. (5) Male month. (6) Menacing dream. (7) Fluffy, odd war. (8) Flu proceeds. (9) Rat went sick. (10) Word? It's ego! (11) Pay clause. (12) Reptile wear. (13) TV? Plonkers act. (14) Wed sweet Loo. (15) Is a woman? No! (16) Enable hand. Grrr! (17) Slave void. (18) Just an iron! Led! (19) Foot energies. (20) My aged chemical.
If you can do better, contact us at golfmasters@irish-times.ie.
