To be honest, it didn’t seem like the week could get any odder until Saturday night came around and TG4′s Seán Ó Finneadha was battling to be heard above Garth Brooks while commentating on the Shelbourne v Peamount game, Tolka Park being only the toss of a stetson from Croker.
Stephanie Roche took full advantage of the Peamount defence being distracted by the opening bars of Friends in Low Places to score the game’s only goal in the second half, Máire Treasa Ní Cheallaigh breaking our hearts by bidding us slán just as If Tomorrow Never Comes was reaching its climax, some of us with our lighters already aflame.
So, yes, all quite odd, but by then we’d heard Ian Darke, on Thursday evening, utter the immortal line “Robbie Savage is with me tonight and we’ll get his reflections [on the death of the queen] in due course”.
Soon after.
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Robbie: “Yeah. Terrible news. So sad. Commentating on a game of football this evening obviously pales in to insignificance with such a sad loss ...”
[Pause]
Ian: “Malacia helping the ball forward there for United — only £13 million, he’s proved a really good signing.”
It was, of course, a tricky one for BT, but they were as respectful as they could be before/during/after Manchester United’s Europa League game against Real Sociedad, sending their pundits home and filling the build-up with lots of random Champions League goals, then a black screen featuring a photo of the queen (“1926-2022″), swiftly followed by an ad for the channel which began with celebrating Liverpool fans. Which was unfortunate.
When I was being knighted, she just said to me, ‘you know, I’m not particularly fond of cricket’
“A strange and subdued atmosphere at Old Trafford tonight,” said Ian, who mustn’t have been in the place the last 10 years, him reckoning the host’s non-performance was “understandable” under the circumstances.
It might have been if their line-up didn’t only feature one English man, and he was only Harry Maguire. De Gea, Dalot, Lindelof, Malacia, Eriksen, Casemiro, Fred, Antony, Ronaldo and Elanga were all no doubt sad, but it’s not as if they’d grown up under Elizabeth II. But at least Ian resisted suggesting that United refused to score on the night for fear their celebrating would look inappropriate.
Thereafter, British football took a break, the theory being that, while cricket, golf, rugby and the like went ahead, the football-loving riff-raff couldn’t be trusted to act with decorum during moments of silence.
Piers Morgan had two very special guests on his Talk TV show to discuss the sporting postponing issue. “One is a knight of the realm, Sir Ian Botham, the other is ... Harry Redknapp,” he said. Lest ‘arry be a bit hurt by that introduction, Morgan added: “I can’t think of two greater Britons, frankly, to be joining me tonight than you two.” Sir Ian waved off the acclaim with a chuckle, ‘arry just said “pleja! “.
While Morgan might have hoped that ‘arry would LASH OUT, he was actually in two minds about the football being called off, while Sir Ian felt every sport should have gone the same way as a mark of respect. Even the cricket. Although he recalled that the queen wasn’t a fan. “When I was being knighted, she just said to me, ‘you know, I’m not particularly fond of cricket — but do tell me about your charity work’.”
Her sporting passion was, of course, horse racing, her love for the animals knowing no bounds, as another of Morgan’s guests, her former personal chef Darren McGrady, recalled. “My first job was to peel carrots for her horse,” he said, “and I left The Savoy for that.”
(Incidentally, squeezed in between Sir Ian and ‘arry and Darren was William ‘Captain Kirk’ Shatner, brought on to share his thoughts on the death of the monarch. “Well, I’m sad that the queenly woman has passed,” he said, his very appearance leaving the show’s viewers — Cyril and Mabel — asking “what?”)
Over at the cricket, meanwhile, Mike Atherton was introducing a montage dedicated to the queen which opened with a flag at half mast, followed by a newspaper headline that read “Sport calls a halt on a day of mourning”. Eh. And then he played us footage of all the wickets England took that day against South Africa, over a soundtrack of “You Raise Me Up” and King Charles’ address to the nation.
The weekend finished on a happier note, though, thanks to our Shane Lowry holding off our Rory and Jon Rahm to win the BMW PGA Championship.
“Winning is always an emotional experience ... did the circumstances this tournament was played in heighten those emotions,” Sky’s Tim Barter asked him.
“I think so ... this is one for the good guys,” he replied.
Barter, you’d a notion, was thinking of Liz. Shane, you’d reckon, was thinking of LIV. All we needed was The Thunder Rolls booming in the background.