Dr William Kerr, Jennifer Moir, Ryan Savage, Eric Harold, Steve and Lawrence Kilkenny, Stewart Currie, Steve Middleton, Gerry Hynds, Robert Hunter, Grant O'Rourke, Paul Cummings, Stephen Kelly and Brian Rocks. Who are they?

Almost half the crowd that turned up at Clydebank's opening match of the season against East Stirling, as revealed by the Scottish Daily Record last week. The other 15 people who turned up refused to give their names to the paper (and left the ground wearing false beards and dark sunglasses, we assume).