Is there, in the length and breadth of Ireland, a man more likable than Garron Noone? Like your favourite culchie cousin who counts Deliveroo as his principal hobby and has big opinions on pasta shapes and crisp flavours, Noone has endeared himself to the nation with impressive speed: he climbed his way into our hearts largely through the opinionated and hilarious TikTok and Instagram videos he has been producing since mid-2022. These days he has more than two million social-media followers and his “Follow me, I’m delicious” sign-off has been inducted into our national Catchphrase Hall of Fame, alongside “Spit on me, Dickie,” and “Roll it there, Colette”.
It was only a matter of time before Noone had his own podcast – or, as he prefers to call it, audio entertainment experience. Listen, I’m Delicious, which launched on October 4th, is loosely structured – emphasis on the loosely – around the theme of favourite foods and snacks. Every week a guest brings the delicacies they most prize – think Lilt and Bacon Fries – a discussion of which ensues, and conversation meanders where it will, so far to subjects including the Céide Fields, shoving garlic cloves up your nose, and St Patrick.
Noone, a recent transplant to Dublin from Ballina who misses the cows but is buoyed by the increase in Deliveroo options, has made his name on snack rankings, and he doubles down here, leaping to the defence of wagon wheels – “exceptional” – and waxing lyrical on ready-salted Hula Hoops (on which point he is not wrong). The guests to date are friends, comedians and influencers from similar social spaces to the ones he has come to dominate, who work largely as a foil for Noone. The host makes some effort to stay on message – episode one delivers on some mildly massaged breakfast facts, including that cornflakes were invented to stop masturbation – but largely freewheels through the interviews, betting hard on his personal charm to carry the day.
Ultimately, he wins. Noone’s slow bass delivery counterpointed by his surprisingly tinkly laugh are an audio gift, but he’s also the genuine article. He’s not ashamed to express his fear of Egg McMuffins, which he associates with being abducted by aliens, nor his excessive fondness for the Dublin restaurant Camden Rotisserie. Given his substantial American following, he does his bit to bring them into the fold with explanations of some of the Irishisms being slung their way. For this is the Irishest of podcasts, and I wonder how many stateside will truly follow how butter choices could threaten a friendship, why the consumption of curry chips leads directly to violence, and what Cidona even is.
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In short, Listen, I’m Delicious is just the kind of ambling, slightly undercooked media production you might expect from a host who has built his reputation on purposefully janky two-minute videos about Irishness and biscuits. But who cares if we’re shuffling from spicebags to skydiving as an Olympic sport? The man who calls himself the geography teacher of TikTok loses some of his edge in this longer format but also reveals more of himself, thereby taking one step closer to national-treasure status. And why wouldn’t he? Like a breakfast roll with two black puddings, he’s delicious after all.