If you know anyone who needs an adrenalin recharge, John Bradshaw, manager and skipper of the Dublin Bay Sea Thrill, should be able to sort them out. Suitable stag-party candidates, resigning employees and birthday girls have all been accordingly whisked and spun around Bradshaw's vigorous Thriller boat rides. Surfing the waves has become a popular choice for corporate parties, which supply a 90 per cent slice of business to Dublin Bay Sea Thrill.
A Friday evening phenomenon, the office parties usually number 10 to 20 aspiring marines, who come to blast the cobwebs away after work during the long summer evenings - and possibly relax over a barbecue afterwards.
`It's with the larger bookings that the fun really starts," says Bradshaw. "That's when the water warfare begins."
Hyper-active stags and hens are subjected to an even more gruelling test in the waters, with many given a solo spin around the bay in the smaller ring boats especially designed to cater for jeering peers. Fans have described the boat experience as "more bouncy than a bucking bronco" and compared it to "the Blackpool pleasure beach in an inner tube". Another passenger comments in the company's welcome book: "You would be arrested for this in the USA."
America is the home of the "blast", where the outrageous "been there, done that" fads are born and tried out before they end up on commercials for fizzy drinks. The Marine boat rescue ride is one of an increasing number of water-sports that have been recently introduced along the coast from Greystones to Howth.
John Bradshaw, the innovator behind Dublin Bay Sea Thrill, was frustrated by attitudes to the Irish sea. "The water is not used enough - it's sad to be surrounded by so much sea and not be able to get into it," he says. But Bradshaw's sea thrill brought the crack to the water three years ago when he obtained a passenger boat licence from the Department of the Marine.
Our shores have not been the same since. As Bradshaw explains, the Dublin Bay Sea Thrill does not require textbook surfing waves and sunny beaches. Ironically, the sea thrill is probably more fun in the rain. "Has anyone ever fallen in?" seems like a fair question. Rarely, is the reply, although voluntary duckings have been known to occur amongst the over-enthusiastic.
Clad in our industrial-strength orange outfits, Bradshaw's next 10 scouts trundle down the East Pier looking like a troop of nervous NASA explorers. Passengers don't actually sit in the "Thriller" but rather poise side-saddle along the buoyancy tubes at the side, holding on to grab ropes and a safety rail with room for two passengers to tuck into the safer seats at the back.
The see-saw ride begins tamely enough and as we watch the HSS float by within the safety speed limits of the harbour, we are lulled into a sense of security, casually fiddling with the ropes and wondering when the champagne is coming. Our skipper is also calmly reassuring. "It's just like watching TV from the back," he soothes. I wonder if my past television experience has been severely deprived as we launch into a real-life sea-adventure as frighteningly therapeutic as the Jaws Trilogy.
The aqua roller-coaster blots out images of sparkling champagne with sprays of foamy saltwater, but we get a better kick out of the latter. Bradshaw warms up with a few swivels and dives to shrieks of approval from the children at the top of the boat, before taking up speed into the real waves.
The semi-inflatable rib boat travels over the waves rather than through them, and skippers claim this prevents sea-sickness. Indeed the trembles affect the heart rather that the stomach on this outing. Riding the sea is a funny spectacle, with rows of orange bottoms lifting off the boat, Mexican-wave style, as it mounts the crest of a wave, and crashes back down again on the other side. Bradshaw teases with sudden changes in velocity and speed, dashing around imaginary whirlpools and hurling equilibrium from one side of the boat to another.
As the small boat takes on a life of its own it's hard to believe that we are on board a contraption designed for marine rescue, and indeed these boats have helped in many rescue operations already this season, with safety features on board including radio VHF, flares and electronic grenade.
Around Dalkey Island the waves get choppier. Orders and slagging are tossed freely from skipper to passenger, and turns are taken in shutting-up and sitting-down. The boat converts revenge tactics into fun and games, and the slags and threats all became part of the charm.
The trips cater for the particular group's needs, with slower options available on special request for those interested in seal and porpoise spotting. Private trips can also be arranged to include barbecues and accommodation depending on demand. Dublin Bay Sea Thrill is generally the children's favourite, but age groups vary. One brave 90-year-old who tried the challenge claimed it was the best £12 he had spent in 55 years. Makes you wonder what he was doing aged 45.
Sea Thrill operates from Howth and Dun Laoghaire. For information and bookings: 01 2600949.