IRISH TIMES ODDITIES:A selection of quirky stories from The
Irish Timesarchives.
DRAWING ON HIS COFFIN
A few years ago lived near Dudley a rich but eccentric old gentleman, who was fond of promising people who did him a favour an oak coffin at their death. A man whom he promised an oak coffin, being short of money, called on the old gentleman and asked him the difference in value of an oak and an elm coffin. When told the difference, he begged of the gentleman to give it to him, as an elm coffin would do for him. And, later on, being hard up again, he called and asked the difference in value of an elm and deal coffin, and received it. He called once more to know the difference in value of a deal coffin and some slabs or rough boards nailed together, which he said would be good enough for him. On telling him, he asked for the difference, which the gentleman then gave him. All the same, on the death of the improvident man, the old gentleman sent a good oak coffin for him as he had promised.
July 29th, 1899
A COINCIDENCE ON THE CARDS
Seaman Nigel Shee was not surprised when he got two birthday cards from his sisters in honour of his “21st”. But, looking at the cards, he did get a surprise – they were both exactly the same, although they had been posted 1,500 miles apart. One was bought and posted by Mrs Beryl McVea – in Bangor, Co Down; the other bought and posted by Mrs Ida Hue – in Cyprus. Because he was at sea, Nigel did not get the cards on his birthday. They had to travel 23,000 miles round the world to reach him at his home in England.
April 10th, 1954
EXTRAORDINARY HOAX IN KERRY
A large number of printed circulars were posted up through the town of Castleisland and surrounding districts during the past week to the effect that one Mr R Whittington, Agent-General to His Majesty’s Government at Mauritius and Zanzibar, would attend at Castleisland on Thursday for the purpose of buying cats at remunerative prices, 5,000 being wanted. Accordingly on Thursday, a number of persons could be seen wending their way to town, some of them with bags, in which were cats, but their chagrin can be imagined when they found out that the whole affair was a hoax.
September 23rd, 1907
WOMAN IN MILLIONS
Reports that a Co Down woman has given birth to her fifth set of twins brought pencils out at the offices of the Royal Commission on Population. Their calculation showed that 40-year-old Mrs Mary Kelly is a woman in 4,000,000,000. But, say the commission, this calculation assumes that the five twin births were all independent. It takes no account of heredity and the knowledge that a woman who has one or two sets of twins stands a good chance of having more. Is Mrs Kelly’s family a record? She has a rival in an Indian woman, of Durban, South Africa, who reported her fifth set in 1946 before she was 30. Sets of three and four are common.
January 12th, 1948