So goodbye from the Mini-Estadi, where a mega-disaster against a mini-nation was narrowly averted. Promises were made and undertakings were given. The Andorran goalie would be a clown, their team would aspire to the humble vocations like butchering, baking or candlestick-making. Our slender professionals would make whoopee in the Catalan sun.
The ski resort mob didn't play along, though, churlishly refusing to be the fall guys in our little exhibition of excellence. We got to half time without having opened them up from play. Roy Keane had his eyes on full glare. Mick McCarthy was greyer ever time you looked at him. Everyone else looked sheepish. An Ian Harte penalty was our only reward for amassing the greatest collection of cross-field passes ever seen on one pitch. "I'm just pleased we won 30," said Mick McCarthy afterwards. If you ever hear a man just freed from death row saying he's just happy to be getting a night's sleep you'll know the sort of understatement involved. This could have been a calamity on the scale of Liechtenstein.
"I don't like these games." he said "Nobody does. It's frustration personified, it really is. All we can do is win the game. Winning friends? (sighs) ... ah, we're not going to do that. We've got masses to lose and really, we've done our job." The comfort is in the calculations. Ireland have now played four of their five away games in Group Two. If McCarthy had been offered the record of two wins and two draws from those excursions he'd have sold his soul to the devil. "Two games. We got six points, we got seven goals and we conceded none. We haven't played fantastically well but both teams made it hard. They keep the ball and do what they do very well, yet in the first half we had five or six very good chances. "
The first sign of problems came early on when McCarthy sent Gary Doherty to warm up along the touchline after 15 minutes. We'd been huffing and puffing but looked unlikely to blow the piste chaps down. We reached for the bludgeon, with poor Dave Connolly ignominiously being put back into the scabbard. "It was in my mind going into the game" said McCarthy "I watched the tape this afternoon; I knew if we didn't open them up early on we'd have to throw a target-man on. It was the right thing to do. Gary gave us a bit of a physical threat. He does okay up there but he's not a centre forward. We were loath to throw a ball into the box at all; we were playing it side to side and in and out and never really threw one in."
They say that there's nothing sadder than a town with no cheer, but a cocky striker on a bad streak comes close. Robbie Keane trooped off the field yesterday with a face which suggested personal bereavement. Forgive him, ye gods, it's been six weeks since his last goal. This trip should have been shooting practice for the wonder boy, instead it was a tantric exercise in deferred gratification.
"If you measure confidence in goals and goal attempts it's not happening for him, is it?" said McCarthy. "I said to him coming off, sometimes it does happen and sometimes it doesn't. It's frustrating for strikers. He has to keep working, has to keep doing it at his club. That transfers itself into international form. I've said before, we have leaned very heavily on him. I'm just happy the contributions are coming from elsewhere." The other main talking points were the outcomes of McCarthy's tinkering in personnel matters. Messrs Duff and Holland got qualified approval from their boss. "Mattie is a good player. Kins and Roy would be my favoured partnership. Everyone knows that. But Kins has not had too many games so Mattie is a ready-made replacement. Duffer's contribution was: worked hard; difficult for him, they worked so hard to stop him getting crosses in. In the first half he did what he is good at in terms of beating players. He gave us a momentum on a couple of occasions. That lifts the crowd and other players around him when he does that."
And the Andorrans? Trickier and more doughty than they had let on beforehand. They were content to put their entire population behind the ball and play for a draw, which is their right. McCarthy could respect the tactic without enjoying it.
And finally the statutory mention of Roy Keane. There is a little ritual here. We say: Isn't Roy wonderful? Mick says: "Roy Keane was terrific again, he leads us on, he leads us by example."
The promised land is five games away then. Half way there and if certain seas were easier parted than certain defences we're keeping the faith. All bow and say amen.