As a non-binary activist Kay has worked with groups like the Irish Trans Students’ Alliance (ITSA), and they have served on the board of Transgender Equality Network of Ireland (TENI) in the past. Non-Binary+ Ireland was founded in July 2015. Someone who identifies as ‘non-binary’ is a person who identifies somewhere outside the binary male & female genders.
Express
: Do you think pronoun introductions should be incorporated into normal speech and society? Are non-traditional pronouns such as ‘ze or zir’ helpful for giving people more choices, or do they make it easier for skeptics to ridicule the issue?
Kay:
Definitely. I’ve found the best way to let someone know what my pronouns are is to introduce them right off the bat. “Hey, nice to meet you Ed, what are your pronouns…? Oh awesome, mine are ‘they.'” It’s simple, easy, and educates everyone you meet of the importance of pronouns and not assuming.
I use ‘they’ pronouns, but some non-binary people use she, he, ze, sie, hir, co, ey, or a different pronoun. It can be tough to use a pronoun that’s not she or he because sometimes people have to learn to use it and will decide it’s too complicated. But there are great games you can find online to help you use these pronouns, such as the Pronouns App.
There’s still so much stigma surrounding non-binary identities in the trans community. There’s the fear that our flexibility around gender and use of a broader set of pronouns can lead to increased ridicule of the trans community. Indeed, this can be the case, but by stigmatising people we’re prioritising the skeptics as opposed to standing up for those non-binary people ridiculed in our community.
Gender-neutral clothing lines have come under criticism for being catered to tall, androgynous-looking white people. People who have typically feminine or masculine traits – such as curves or a beard – are often in turn told that they ‘don’t look non-binary enough’. How do we best get recognition for non-binary people in society, while also not creating a category that alienates its own members?
Kay:
In our advocacy we need to constantly be highlighting the diversity in the non-binary community. We’re short, we’re tall, we’re femme, we’re masc, we’re wibbly-wobbly, we’re androgynous, we’re fat, we’re skinny, we’re old, we’re young, we’re people of colour, we’re white, and we’re people of a variety of ethnic, religious and socioeconomic backgrounds.
There’s sometimes an assumption when people come across Non-Binary+ Ireland that we’re somehow exclusionary of anyone who doesn’t fit some kind of definition of non-binary. We’re super inclusive though, that’s why we have the plus in our name. It includes anyone and everyone who feels non-binary, whether that’s their sole gender identity, or whether they only feel a little bit non-binary or gender non-conforming- we’re here.
I’ve been asked, “Why does Non-Binary+ Ireland exist then, if non-binary is such a broad thing, don’t other trans organisations cover this? Do we even need an organisation for this?” The answer is a very strong yes. We’re essential to the non-binary community – one which is stigmatised, is barred from receiving medical transition treatment, is excluded from legal gender recognition, is the regular target of attacks, is the least understood and recognised, and has been constantly ignored by the trans community, until Non-Binary+ Ireland came along.
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