When Oisín Hoy’s family discovered he had been killed in a road accident while travelling in South America in June, they were devastated.
The 29-year-old Dubliner, who had been working as a customer success manager in the city, was also a life coach and website designer with a passion for meeting new people, exploring different cultures and travelling.
The crash in a remote area of Bolivia also resulted in several people being injured. Although Mr Hoy was initially treated in a medical centre in the region, he did not survive the three-and-a-half-hour journey by ambulance to hospital.
Broken by their loss, the family has decided to raise money in his honour for a children’s charity which was close to his heart.
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“Oscar’s Kids was an important charity for Oisín as his friend’s daughter, Nora, was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour,” says his sister Niamh Hoy, who works for Harris PR.
He had helped to organise fundraising challenges such as ‘Dippers for Nippers’ – a sea-swimming event in which swimmers spend an increasing amount of time in cold water throughout November.
Sadly Nora died, but her family continues to fundraise in her memory. The charity works with children diagnosed with cancer and helps support their families.
“We included Oscar’s Kids in Oisín’s RIP.ie notice and would encourage people to donate any amount they can in memory of Oisín. Harris PR has supported through a generous donation and also shared posts to help spread awareness”, Ms Hoy says.
The O’Doherty family in Dublin are among the families who have received support from Oscar’s Kids.
Their daughter Freya was diagnosed with an aggressive brain tumour in 2018. She endured years of treatment including surgery, radiotherapy and chemotherapy. Her mother, Emma, contacted the charity to ask if they could help.
Like many families looking after children with a life-threatening condition, money was tight, but the charity did all it could. It helped with travel and food costs when Freya was receiving treatment and it organised trips, so she and her family could enjoy time out and create special memories.
When Freya died last February aged 19, Oscar’s Kids also helped with funeral costs.
“This is a tiny charity, run by a grieving mum and dad and their other beautiful son,” Freya’s mother, Emma, says.
“It is run solely on donations and grants they apply for. The help they offer is not just about making memories with your dying child, which is the main objective, but they also help to keep the lights on, the fridge full and the house warm. They bring magic to the sick child with gifts, trips and experiences as they did with Freya. And those memories are priceless.”
Remembering someone who is no longer here is essential for grieving loved ones.
Ms Hoy says her family is spending a lot of time together, sharing stories of her brother Oisín and hearing what he meant to others in his life.
“I’ve always known him as my brother so it has been great to hear stories from other parts of his life and about the adventures he got up to,” she says.
“We continue to receive messages from far and wide – from sports clubs, community groups, work colleagues about the many people’s lives he touched. Hearing that he had such a big impact on so many people with his warm smile, positive attitude and big bear hugs is of great comfort to us.
“The funeral was also helpful for closure and Fr Pat in Dollymount was so accommodating. The five of us [parents Kevin and Mary and siblings Peter, Caoimhe and Niamh] as well as Oisín’s lifelong friend, Sean, gave eulogies after Mass.
“Attendees wore bright clothes to honour his vibrant personality, making the church a sea of different colours and, as the Clontarf GAA played a big part in Oisín’s life, the club hosted the get-together after the funeral where more memories were shared.”
Since his death, people around the world have planted trees and pollinator plants in his memory, a testament to his travels and love of meeting people.
“Already there is a mango tree at a school in Zambia, native flowers in Crumlin, trees in France, Spain, the US, Italy, the UK and throughout Ireland – so Oisín continues his journey around the world and his memory lives on,” Ms Hoy says.
“We’re continuing to feel a huge amount of support from the community and are very grateful to everyone that has reached out or shown support in other ways.
“We’re being gentle and patient with ourselves and each other. It’s important to understand that everyone processes grief at different paces and in different ways. There’s no right or wrong way. I’ll be doing a mundane task and a memory of Oisín will pop into my head leading to tears, and that’s perfectly okay.
“You have to go with the ebbs and flows of grief and accept that the life that once was is gone and start picking up the pieces to create a new one. We have to try to find positives each day, big or small and make sure to get out in nature especially if you don’t feel up to it.”
Donations to Oscar’s Kids can be made at www.oscarskids.ie
