I hate public speaking
Racing heart, sweaty palms, death grip on the lectern, anyone? Many of us would rather eat a spider than speak in public. This fear is common and its associated sensations shouldn’t surprise us, experts say. To overcome our fear, we must understand its evolutionary roots, says clinical hypnotherapist Fiona Brennan, author of The Positive Habit. “These physical responses are really normal. Our ancestors would have frozen if the rest of the pack was looking at them. It would have indicated a problem and that maybe we were going to be thrown out of the group. If we are thrown out of the group, we don’t survive.”
So freaking out is common?
Yes. As soon as we stand up in front of others, our primal fear instinct kicks in and we start to have a physical response. “A lot of people don’t really understand that and they think something is wrong with them. It is a universal and normal response to something your body can perceive as a threat. Being the centre of attention is a threat.”
But I’m truly terrified!
The trick is to expect the fear, says Brennan. “Expect your heart to go fast and your hands to sweat, don’t expect that not to be there. But know that you can calm the nervous system through the body. It’s all about the breath. Breathing into your belly sends a message of calm.”
How does it work?
When we face a real threat, we start to breathe quickly and this sends a message to our bodies to fight or run. “When we are mobilised like that, we are not able to think straight. Our brain shuts down because now it’s all about survival,” says Brennan. Breathing properly prevents this cycle. “Breathe in through your nose, imagining you have a balloon in your belly to inflate. Feel the rise of your belly and then exhale fully and for longer through the mouth. Whatever thoughts are going through your head, your body is saying there is no real threat, I feel safe, I feel calm.”
Visualise success
When required to stand up and speak in front of others, many visualise it going badly. Try visualising being calm. If you do experience a wobble, show yourself some compassion or share your vulnerability, says Brennan. “You don’t have to harp on about being nervous, but say, ‘Give me a moment here, I’m going to take a breath and I’ll be back on track’. It shows that you are human. You are not trying to pretend you have it all worked out.”
It’s about the message
Focusing on your message can take the focus off you. “Ask yourself, ‘Why am I here today, why am I being asked to do this?’ Then you have a sense of purpose and that purpose is bigger than you,” says Brennan. “The message you are delivering is much more important than what people think of you.”
Break with the past
Just because you think you presented badly before doesn’t mean it will happen again. “If a teacher humiliated you, or you were hungover in college and mucked something up, reframe those experiences,” advises Brennan. “That was in the past. You are not comparing like with like. This time you prepare the content, prepare your mind, prepare your body, making sure you have eaten well and slept. You have a strategy. If you prepare well and it goes well, that becomes your new reference point.”
