GIVE ME A BREAK:THERE'S A woman, let's call her Ethel, who has several school-going children, and spends her free mornings shopping. Ethel's "shopping" is of a higher order than ours.
“Reconnaissance” would be more apt. Every weekday morning, she sets off on the Dart to town to check on all the things she wants to buy. She looks out of step as she trawls through department stores taking inventory of the stock. She “visits” particular items several times to reassure herself they are still there, then when they come down in price she waits for them to be knocked down further before buying. She gets a “little thrill” when she eventually purchases at deep discount.
Last week, she bought glassware and other things for her Christmas dining table at incredible knock-down prices at one of the big department stores. She went on and on about the great value to be had.
Her husband is in full-time employment and, one presumes, pays for all Ethel’s stuff, no questions asked. I certainly wouldn’t want to be him asking her to justify the expenditure.
“Very high quality and for that price! You wouldn’t get it in the North!” As she patrols the shops, Ethel could convince anyone that she is fulfilling her destiny.
Maybe she’s the sort of person who will get a kick out of being able to shop on St Stephen’s Day, just to see the prices fall on those objects she’s been “visiting” for months. And what about those people who camp out all night on footpaths to buy a refrigerator or a bed at deep discount? Are they going to be celebrating Christmas night on the streets? Will Ethel be among them with her discount duck down duvet and her designer hot-water bottle, with its cute knitted cover? And will there be people working on Christmas Day in the department stores just to give the Ethels of this world their thrills the next day?
For Ethel, maybe St Stephen’s Day will be even better than Christmas, though St Stephen’s Day is better than Christmas for more important reasons. The planning and preparation and cooking are over, the pressure’s off, and you can lounge around eating cold leftovers while watching junk on TV or reading that perfect book that someone was thoughtful enough to give you. Then comes the long walk with the family or friends, or perhaps a visit to someone you haven’t seen in a while, then back home by dark for more lounging about in front of the fire with a game of Scrabble.
December 26th – if you have the day off – is the one day in the calendar when there is nothing you are obliged to do. It’s a delightful switch-off from the outside world – Ireland’s unofficial mental health day. In the dark week between Christmas and New Year, all of Ireland catches its breath. You don’t have to be Christian to enjoy the mood.
In the past, we used to feel so sorry for the gardaí, fireman and nurses who worked that day. There was always a newspaper article interviewing them about what it was like.
They’re not alone any more. Now the 26th is just another day.
While I’ve worked my share of St Stephen’s Days, since we publish on the 27th if it isn’t a Sunday, I still think that the only paid work on Christmas Day and St Stephen’s Day should be absolutely necessary work. While I’ve heard it said that the shops opening on the 26th is yet further encroachment of godless UK and US values, that’s not what makes me disapprove. My reason is that we need a rest this year more than ever, and on top of that we’re learning to live within our means.
Ethel may still be getting a kick out of shopping, but the rest of us have reassessed our priorities and found better things to do.
The traffic jams of yore are gone, and you can nearly see the tumbleweed blowing down the thoroughfares and through the huge open-plan retail spaces of the nougthies’ temples, while bored shop assistants practically beg to be of assistance and even the mannequins look disgruntled.
On St Stephen’s Day, the shops will be trying to lure us in with what they promise will be extravagant discounts, but if the item that is on sale on St Stephen’s Day for half the price it was fewer than 48 hours before, then why wasn’t the shop selling it for 50 per cent less in the first place if it could still make a profit? Only the Ethels of this world fall for the phrase “Save 50 per cent!” You’re not saving anything. The only way to save money is to keep it in your wallet.
So on St Stephen’s Day, let’s stay home by the fire. There can hardly be anything so life-enhancing on sale on St Stephen’s Day that it can’t be bought on the 27th or the 28th, if it is to be bought at all.
