Madam, - I was very saddened to read the circumstances of the death of the wife of William Hennessy (Letters, March 21st). His description of his hurt on behalf of his late wife, as well as his feelings of isolation, must touch the hearts of all who have cared for patients and families within a hospital environment.
The love for his wife is so evident in his description of his care for her for four years. How sad that during her last days he was unable to do so but I found it particularly poignant that it has taken him almost two years to express his feelings.
This scenario really saddens me as a nurse who has worked in the field of cancer nursing for nearly 20 years.
Every day I hear about the circumstances surrounding the final days and hours of a loved one from a bereaved family member.
Due to excellent and expert nursing and medical care, many bereaved describe sadness and pain but felt supported throughout the dying experience and were able to verbalise their thoughts and feelings.
However, there are also those like Mr Hennessy, who remain hurt to the core almost two years later.
Bereavement and loss take many forms and those who seem calm, dignified and accepting of a death may in fact be those who are unable to verbally express their great loss for a long time.
Although there are many excellent services available to the bereaved, there must be a way of ensuring that the level of grief experienced by Mr Hennessy is addressed.
Such inability to express grief may lead to increased isolation as time passes and cause inability to retain contact with their social and peer network.
Such breakdown in social structures leads to further incapacitation, including physical, psychological and spiritual pain. - Yours, etc,
URSULA M COURTNEY, Director of Services, ARC Cancer Support Centre, Eccles Street, Dublin 7.