It might be fair to say that the country hadn’t been all a-tingle about our two-leg Nations League tussle with Bulgaria, not even when you told anyone who’d listen that the not unsubstantial prize at stake was the avoidance of playing in League C next time around alongside teams sprinkled with plumbers, plasterers and pharmacists. “It’s a long feckin’ way from Italia ‘90,” was the gist of the replies.
Granted, it is. And all that 35-year-anniversary reminiscing of late about said Italia ‘90 has hardly been helpful, a reminder of somewhat better days when Heimir Hallgrímsson is doing his utmost to bring back the Olé Olés. Besides, not one of the current squad was even born in 1990, so it’s as topical to them as, say, the Battle of the Boyne.
But one of the Italia ‘90 crew was decidedly chipper when he turned up on the Six One News, Ray Houghton buoyed by that 2-1 win in Plovdiv on Thursday which put Ireland on a one-game winning streak.
“I haven’t seen as many happy faces in a long, long time,” he said as he looked around at the empty stands in the Aviva Stadium, them not yet being filled. “The feel-good factor is back.”
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Peter Collins and his panel of Richie Sadlier and Kevin Doyle wanted to feel just good as Ray, but they couldn’t but recall a heap of previous new dawns that soon sank without a trace.
“We need to counter all the optimism and positivity,” said Richie, before giving us a bunch of reasons for why we should have been humongously optimistic and positive ahead of the game.
“There’s a lot of negativity in Bulgarian football at the moment, a lot of toxicity, they’ve loads of issues, they’re on their knees ... they are just about the most awful team I’ve seen us play in years – remind me of who’s been worse? They’re terrible.”
Now, that assessment couldn’t but give you a boost, but Kevin only went and inserted a pin in our balloon of hopefulness. “We’ve underperformed against really bad teams before,” he noted, Richie nodding ruefully.
Still, you could imagine Heimir’s prematch chat with the lads, one that would surely have inspired them. “Work as hard as TG4’s split-screen operators and table-updaters did today for the final round of National League football games – up Mayo! – and you’ll be grand.”
And so off we went. A silky enough start. And then, a half-hour in, just about the most awful team we’ve played in years only went and bloody scored.
“That certainly was not in the Irish script,” Darragh Maloney sighed while Ray counted the sad faces in the now filled stands. “The misery factor is back,” he didn’t say, but you’d a notion he was thinking it.
Half-time. Gloom, a despondent Kevin and Richie laying their heads on their studio desk. “But we’re used to disappointment,” said Richie, “watching this Irish team it feels inevitable that something is going to happen ...”. Namely, bad things. You know what they say. It’s the hope that kills you.
Time to lay Italia ‘90 memories to rest. At which point Hall of Fame inductee Niall Quinn turned up on the pitch for a chat with Tony O’Donoghue.
The only change at the break was the ref, his calf banjaxed, so he was replaced by the fourth official who looked around twelve. And, eventually, off we went.
And just as this couch offered an expert opinion on Evan Ferguson’s lack of match fitness and the need for him to be taken off, he only went and scored. And just as this couch bemoaned Adam Idah being brought on instead of Rocco Vata, Adam Idah only went and scored. The moral of the story? Be grateful Heimir is in charge and not this couch.
Dundalk man Jimmy Dunne, meanwhile, came on for his international debut. Why wasn’t he playing for Norn Iron, his Ma hailing from Enniskillen? “In Dundalk, I don’t think you can consider it too much. I don’t want to go missing or anything.”
What wasn’t missing? The feel good factor. 4-2 winners on aggregate, League B status retained, the plumbers, plasterers and pharmacists will have to live without us.
True, true, it doesn’t yet feel like a new dawn, but after the few years we’ve had, you’d take a two-game winning streak. Hang in there, Heimir might give us a few Olé Olés yet.
