It's a Dad's Life: A while back I tuned into a discussion on The Last Word on the practice of taking stem cells from the umbilical cords of newborns. While there doesn't seem to be any ethical dilemmas with regard to this, there is some dispute as to whether the practice is worthwhile.
Parents are now paying companies to store cord blood in case the stem cells contained in it could help treat medical conditions within the family further down the line.
However, there are dissenting voices. There is a belief that in the future it will be easier to obtain stem cells from other tissues, making it unnecessary to store the cells. Either way, the procedure is available and, if the parents have the €1,850 required, it is up to them to decide whether it is worthwhile.
My interest is purely academic because at the moment I would rather have my liver dug out with a rusty spoon than have another kid. But I was listening to the discussion on the radio while driving to a friend's house who was about to have number three.
On arriving, I ran inside to tell her, as she may have been interested in the procedure herself. By this stage the item had ended and my friend was not particularly bothered, but she asked me "Would it in any way encourage you to go for another?" To which I replied, "I would rather die from one of the diseases the stem cells could help prevent."
Firstly, I want to apologise to my childbearing buddy right now for my utter lack of sensitivity. (As an aside, she has a fascinating nickname, The Duke, given by her partner many years ago. Real name Jane, rhymes with John Wayne, who was . . . you get it. I guess that makes her partner The Duchess.) The Duke was at the pinpoint of the difficult stage of pregnancy, trundling around as horizontal as she was vertical, and taking care of two thundering toddlers at the same time.
There I was, swearing I could never again bear to go through another infancy for fear the start of one life would really be the end of mine.
Secondly, what is my problem? The elder child's birth was a watershed for me. There was never any doubt that we would have at least one more and when the younger arrived, we were chuffed to bursting. So why the reticence to grow the family? A lot of the lads are asking me, "Would you not like a boy, chief?" Right now, every cell, stem included, is saying absolutely not.
The issue hasn't yet become an issue. The younger is only 19 months old and cluckiness is firmly consigned to the coop. We have just signed up to a full Sky Digital package and the Missus and I want to get down, not down'n'dirty like the old days, down'n'damn lazy. Trailfinders have us on their mailing list and we're drooling over the Australia and New Zealand brochures. I spend a lot of time admiring sportscars on eBay and toying with the idea of a 10-year-old €220 coupe brought in from the UK.
The Mothercare catalogue is in the recycling pile and I've heard the Missus, on more than one occasion, beam that she's "finally lost all the baby weight!" But are we just convincing ourselves that we are members of the real world because we have an inkling we could be back in the hollow-eyed land of new parenthood before you can say battery-operated breast-milk expresser?
I watch The Duke and Duchess and wonder. Number three breezed into the world in a relatively straightforward labour last Sunday in the comfort of their own home. I got a phone call at 9.50 that night, "Mate, if you have any toilet roll and baby wipes could you bring them up? The Duke's just gone into labour. I'm trying to get the birthing pool pumped up and I didn't have a chance to get to the shops today, the Dubs were playing." I obliged and an hour later, another call, "Well, that's all done and dusted. Baby girl, mother doing fine, thanks for bringing the stuff up." He doesn't mince his words.
Congratulations to the whole royal lot of them, and welcome baby girl, you will find yourself at the centre of a close and loving family. We are monitoring your bold and brave adventure closely; you are our test group on which decisions may be based in the future!
