ANYONE else notice how much better the world is since Sting decided to save it a decade or so ago? The most recent research on the plight of the rainforests shows that, they used to cover 14 per cent of the earth's surface. That percentage is currently at six, and some of the more reputable environmental groups predict that the remaining rainforests could disappear completely within 40 years. Not that you'll see Sting returning any of the environmental awards he has been given.
There's something distressing about rock 'slebs getting involved in matters that require a little thought. Look no further than that band who played a "Free Tibet" benefit gig unencumbered by the knowledge of where Tibet actually was and what it needed freeing from.
These types love their worthy causes almost as much as the promotional opportunities they afford them, and this week they're jumping all over themselves to attach themselves to a movement which has the tragic misfortune to call itself "Global Cool". On Planet Rock, global warming and all that sort of stuff is the new bandwagon, which is why Global Cool is the only cause in town these days.
You can now rest easy about the potential apocalyptic consequences of climate change because Razorlight are on the case. They, alongside such monstrous global names such as KT Tunstall (she has a new album due out), Perry Farrell and Flea from the Chili Peppers, are helping publicise Global Cool and a series of five Live Aid-style concerts this summer.
Global Cool have also just unveiled their anthem, but it's hardly likely to be memorable given that it's a Perry Farrell remix of an obscure Doors song called Woman in the Window.
The idea behind the campaign is a 10-year plan that calls on the world's population to cut their individual CO2 emissions (aka carbon footprints) by a tonne annually. This is all to prevent us waking up one morning to find our next door neighbours are Icelandic.
Apart from having to actually listen to KT Tunstall in order to save the world, you will also be encouraged to donate the euro equivalent of £20 to the campaign. The bulk of this goes to alternative energy and energy reduction projects, but £3 out of every £20 has been earmarked for Global Cool Productions Ltd, which will fund a bunch of carbon-neutral shows.
Donations and Live Aid concerts are all well and good, but here's the thing about rock 'slebs and climate change. By her own admission, KT Tunstall produces 650 tonnes of carbon emissions a year. The national average for the UK and Ireland is 11. This is because Tunstall and Razorlight and all the other bands associating themselves with this campaign press up hundreds of thousands of CDs a year and go on endless plane/bus/car journeys while touring. Both these activities produce huge carbon emissions.
Leaving aside whatever you make of either The Rolling Stones or Coldplay, both bands have worked hard over the last few years to ensure that they are "carbon neutral", meaning they put back into the environment what they take out. Radiohead, for their part, are seriously considering not touring simply because of the amount of carbon emissions involved in the process.
Here's an idea for all the "Global Cool" bands. Become carbon neutral or shut up lecturing us about climate change. If, between now and when the Global Cool concerts take place, you can demonstrably prove that you have drastically reduced the amount of carbon emissions you produce, then we might take you seriously. Until then, enjoy the photo opportunity.